


Magic er Love: or, an Evak Hogwarts AU

by ravenclawkward



Category: SKAM (Norway)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Blow Jobs, But Not Much, Coming Out, Eventual Smut, First Time, Frottage, Hufflepuff!Even, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Masturbation, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, slytherin!isak, some - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-18
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:07:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22780726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravenclawkward/pseuds/ravenclawkward
Summary: Isak's head is full of homework, worries about his mom, and pretending to be something he's not. There's no room for the new Hufflepuff transfer student. Or is there?
Relationships: Even Bech Næsheim/Isak Valtersen
Comments: 73
Kudos: 148





	1. The Boy with Crescent Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve had this idea in my head for months now, and it refuses to leave, so I finally had to get it going. I have the first few chapters written, and the rest are outlined. I’m mainly posting to see if there’s even any interest, so please let me know if I should keep going!
> 
> ***  
> Update - This is now on a weekly posting schedule, with a new chapter every Monday :-)

[ ](https://imgur.com/F43HvAh)

He first saw him on the most ordinary of days. Well, as ordinary as a day at a wizarding boarding school could be.

Trying to embrace some of the last seasonable days of September, Isak, Mahdi, Jonas, and Magnus were lounging by the lake, engaged in the dubiously safe pastime of skipping rocks over the black abyss, usually with a bit of magical assistance. How they hadn’t learned not to provoke the giant squid by their sixth year, there was no telling. The Slytherins in the group were trying to convince Magnus of the existence of merpeople in the lake— _we live_ under water _, Mags, we see them! Bloody perverts they are, too, have you seen them ogling?_

Annoyed as always at the way that the group had a tendency to make everything about sex, even the (frankly terrifying) merpeople, Isak was only halfway paying attention. He was levitating a stone a few inches off of the ground and idly looking across the lawn when his eyes landed abruptly on the most beautiful boy he had ever seen. His stone dropped with a thunk.

The boy was smiling indulgently up at a group of girls clustered around him, his long (long) body relaxed against the base of a tree trunk, utterly at ease. His yellow and black tie was loose around his pale neck, and he had rolled up the sleeves on his uniform shirt, having shed the black school robes to where they lay discarded nearby. His blond hair fluttered in the breeze, which only slightly disturbed his coif. 

Confusion warred with burning curiosity. Where had he come from? The combination of different houses and different years meant that it was possible, if not likely, for Isak to have missed him altogether. He had missed the sorting this year, after all. But it was so rare for students to transfer that he didn’t know how he hadn’t heard of him yet. To be fair, Isak had been stuck in his own head lately, so maybe he just hadn’t been listening.

The boy’s eyes shifted easily from the chattering girls over to Isak, meeting his gaze with an accuracy that could only mean he had attempted it before. 

Isak darted his eyes away quickly, but the image was still etched in his mind. He concentrated on his stone again, but he couldn’t get the same control over it, distracted as he was.

It seemed that their group was the next stop for what looked like Vilde and some of the other Hufflepuff girls. They were a bit nervous, probably because of the 3:1 proportion of Slytherin students, but once they saw Magnus they changed course, angling toward him. Vilde appeared to be the ringleader, so she spoke up first.

“Hi! We wanted to invite you to the first meeting of the new club we’re starting—HUG! It stands for House Unity Group. The Houses shouldn’t be so separated, well, obviously, you all know that,” she said, gesturing at the variety of badges on their robes, “but not everyone does, so we’re having this meeting!” Isak was amazed, as always, at the pure pitch of Vilde’s awkward rambling. Magnus had been sporting a crush on her since third year, so he happily took charge of the conversation, gesticulating wildly in his enthusiasm. 

Isak’s eyes, almost of their own accord, slid back over to glimpse The Boy, but he was gone, loping back up the slope to the castle with his robes slung over his shoulder. Isak couldn’t help but feel disappointed. 

Vilde and her group had already left, so Isak deemed it safe to return to the conversation. Magnus, it appeared, had taken up Vilde’s cause (no surprise there) and was encouraging them to go with him to the meeting that Friday so he could get brownie points with Vilde. 

Isak played it off, but he knew that he was going to go if there was any chance of seeing that boy again.

* * *

The meeting was exactly as the invitation had indicated—completely awkward, if earnest. Too earnest for Isak’s liking. Of course he favored more integration of the houses. If anything, Slytherin felt the injustice of the system the most, being ganged up on by the other three houses. Maybe if more students actually knew a Slytherin instead of instantly shying away in fear, it would be a lot more comfortable for everyone. But the proposed “love exercise” was a bit too far. Isak slid out of the Great Hall, meandering over to one of the courtyards. 

It was slightly chilly in the crisp night air, so Isak cast a quick warming charm over himself as he settled onto a low slung wall, facing out into the courtyard. He loved the castle at night—the ambient sounds of a magical building, a place that never truly slept. The clanking of armor, the snoring of portraits. From his seat he could enjoy an unimpeded view of the night sky, and he spared a thought for his mother, wondering how she was doing.

She had had one of her episodes, so Isak had stayed with her by himself at St. Mungo’s until term started. It’s why he was late to the start of term feast. Headmistress McGonagall knew about his situation, of course, so they had arranged for a Portkey from the hospital to Hogsmeade. The guilt washed over him anew at the mental image of his mother fighting her restraints, and him abandoning her there. 

He was startled out of his shame by a warm, deep voice. 

“Mind if I join you?” 

Isak looked up, up, into newly-familiar crinkled eyes smiling at him. Isak gestured at the wall, a bit shell shocked. He was hoping that when he finally saw the boy from the lawn that he would be smooth—not completely caught off guard. A warm rush came over him when the boy’s own heating charm—or was it just his body heat?—came into contact with Isak’s. 

“Not up for a love exercise?” His voice was accented like Isak’s, and even deeper than he would have expected. It rumbled out of him, gently agitating the air around them. 

Isak scoffed. “Definitely not. What was that even about anyway?”

Even started out on a long winded and obviously made up tale of anonymous dick sucking. Of course he had to be funny as well. Isak was screwed.

Despite his best efforts, Isak found his gaze sliding over to the boy, who was even more beautiful up close. The way the sides of his eyes crinkled as he teased, the cornflower blue almost disappearing in his enthusiasm. His silky golden hair that defied gravity and looked infinitely touchable, mussable. It curled indolently around his ear, tickling his collar. Isak fought the ridiculous impulse to smooth it back, to feel those soft strands for himself. 

He came back to himself, realizing that those perfect lips were forming words that he probably should be paying attention to. He caught the tail end, “...know the club leader, Vilde?” 

“Oh, Vilde. My friend is into her, so we all had to go,” Isak confided sheepishly. 

“I can’t decide if you’re a good friend for agreeing to go or a bad friend for leaving,” he teased. 

A short silence came over them, but Isak was desperate to make the most of this random encounter. 

He scrambled for something, anything to say. “So, you must know Magnus.” _Of course, Isak, they’re in the same house._

“Oh yes,” Even chuckled, with the true air of someone who has had the luck to be graced with the bumbling ball of friendliness that is Magnus. 

Isak took a guess. “He was the first person to talk to you wasn’t he?”

“Before I even sat down at the table,” Even confirmed. 

“Sounds about right,” Isak laughed. 

“He had a lot to tell me about his friends in Slytherin. Especially this Isak fellow’s rapping?”

Isak felt himself turn beet red at the mention. 

“Hey, I’ll have you know he’s an excellent rapper,” he was objecting when he was interrupted by the unwelcome creaking of a door. Even more unwelcome was the person who came through. 

“There you are, Isak!” Emma Larson’s chipper voice rang out. “Vilde said that we should work on our assignments with someone from another house, and I figured we could be partners?” 

Emma, a fifth year Gryffindor, was the unintended result of Isak’s most recent attempt to distract his friends from lack of heterosexuality. One drunken night at the start of term he had turned on the charm—too well it seemed. Now she wouldn’t leave him alone.

“Actually, uhm,” _cough_ “and I already decided to be partners” _cough_. 

Seamlessly, Even picked up on the evasion. 

“Yes we did. I’m Even,” he said, a smile lighting his face as he leaned across Isak to offer his hand. Isak burned at his proximity, the clean, BRISK smell, the sight of those large, defined hands. 

Unfortunately, Emma wasn’t one to go easy. Chattering nonstop, she came up with a plan for them to all work together, and then lingered until the meeting was over, as indicated by the exodus of students flitting in House specific groups once again toward their various dormitories, presumably not aware of the irony. 

Isak spotted Mahdi and took his chance to escape, waving his goodbyes and silently wondering if this would be the last time he got to hang out with Even.

The boy in question seemed to have no doubts on the matter. He grabbed Isak’s arm briefly, and said, in a warm tone that simultaneously brooked no argument, “See you soon, Isak.”

* * *

The roaring crowd provided excellent cover for Isak’s initial foray into learning all he could about Even. He was fairly confident that Jonas, on his other side, couldn’t even hear their conversation.

“So, who’s the new Hufflepuff?” Isak thought he was acting nonchalant but unfortunately knew he was probably falling short. Magnus, of course, didn’t notice, distracted as he was by the Gryffindor/Ravenclaw game playing before them.

His face lit up as he started describing the new boy who transferred from Durmstrang his seventh year for mysterious reasons. “He’s hilarious bro! He writes these comic things, they’re fucking brilliant! They actually put one in the Prophet on Wednesday!” 

Isak let Magnus continue his gushing, pretending to only show vague interest when really he was avidly taking in each word, rather than following the progress of the quaffle around the pitch.

After the match ended in Ravenclaw’s favor and he got back to the Slytherin common room, he waved off Jonas and Mahdi and rooted through the pile of newspapers piled on the coffee table nearest the fireplace, pushing aside the depictions of the Minister of Magic and miscellaneous Quidditch players, all of whom were indignant at his rough treatment of them. 

He finally got annoyed and used an Accio, zooming a much beleaguered Hermione Granger, who graced the cover of Wednesday’s issue, into his hand. Clutching his prize, Isak swiftly and not at all suspiciously ran to his room, firmly closing the door behind him and setting up a ward just in case someone caught him...reading a newspaper. 

His room was in its usual state of mess; robes and schoolwork scattered about, all tinged slightly green from the view of the lake coming in through the thick windows.

He quickly changed into his threadbare pajamas and settled back into his four poster bed, quickly flipping through pages until he found the comics section. Even’s was easy to find as it had a short bio and picture attached, with that elegantly handsome face captured in black and white and grinning out at him. 

Isak tore his eyes away from the portrait to watch the comic. It /was actually pretty funny, a political satire that shocked a chuckle out of him. The movements were fluid and precise, perfectly timed. It takes real talent to be able to perform that kind of magic. The bio only gave a little bit more information, just that Even was from Norway, too, and that he really liked Muggle movies. Isak longed for the internet cafe he frequents back in Oslo—he wanted to know more about the boy. Everything, in fact. He was a bit shocked how all consuming the feeling was: he had gone from no interest in anyone to utter preoccupation.

It had only taken a day, a conversation, and a pair of crescent shaped eyes to completely shift Isak’s world view, and he couldn’t tell yet if it was for the better. As he fell asleep with Even’s face gracing his thoughts, he couldn’t help but think it was.


	2. The Boy in the Clouds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A stolen afternoon and hopes raised.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow guys! I really appreciate all of the support for this fic! I’ll be posting weekly, if not more frequently pending my poor impulse control. The chapter count went up to nine as I tightened the outline, and I have 6 chapters written out completely. Hope you enjoy! (I also added a cover in chapter one and an illustration in this one)
> 
> HUGE thank you to the lovely decraziness for the beta!

“Ferdig!” Isak proclaimed to no one but himself as he put the final flourish on his homework for Professor Binns. The late afternoon sun had been slanting lower in the library window, but Isak had told himself he had to finish this Goblin War comparison before he could relax for the weekend. Jonas had abandoned him long ago to try and catch Eva in the stacks, the slacker. Issues at home peaked during their fifth year, and his OWLs had suffered as a result. He was determined to keep his grades up this year if he wanted any chance of becoming a Healer when he graduated.

He sat back to stretch his arms above his head, wooden chair creaking as he felt some of the stress ease out of his body. 

“Congratulations. You look like you could use a drink.” 

Isak was struck once again by the surprisingly low timbre of Even’s voice, the way it reverberated to Isak’s core, leaving a warm pulsing in its wake. He attempted to smooth his unruly blond curls away from his face, wishing he had his trusty snapback to cover his messy hair. Even looked perfect as always, casually rumpled in his uniform shirt and sweater, leather messenger bag hanging artfully off of one prominent shoulder. His face was split into a wide smile, and his canines were adorably pointed, Isak noticed. 

“Always,” Isak said ruefully. “Too bad I ran out of Firewhiskey, I was going to get some more at Hogsmeade tomorrow, if I could get my aging potion right.”

“I may have some I’m willing to share. No potion required. Come with me,” he said with a smirk, already striding away like he knew Isak would follow.

Isak was technically supposed to meet up with the boys in the Great Hall, but they would think he was still studying if he didn’t show. He hastily capped his ink pot and shoved his things in his bag, following Even out of the library and along a complicated maze of hallways and stairs to...the Divination tower?

With hesitant footsteps, Isak followed him halfway up the tower capped by Professor Trelawney’s Divination classroom, feet shuffling on stone steps and decidedly not admiring the view of Even’s long legs as they powered their way up, up, up.

At a landing about halfway to the top, Even stopped suddenly, and, with a waggle of his eyebrows, indicated for Isak to follow him through a somewhat hidden wooden door into what appeared to be a small, unused classroom, a corner of which was obviously frequented often. The room was at the perfect angle for the setting sun’s light to filter in, tinting the dust particles floating in the air with a yellow glow and giving the whole space a decidedly otherworldly feeling.

“No one likes coming up here, lest they get caught by Trelawney and get their future disasters told. It’s nice to have some quiet, you know? It’s strange living in the same room as total strangers who have known each other for years,” Even confessed as he rummaged in a storage cupboard, lifting wards and coming up successfully with a bottle of Firewhiskey.

“I get that. Slytherin may have its flaws, but at least we get our own rooms,” Isak boasted easily. 

He stepped toward the far wall where several scraps of paper were fluttering against the stones. Isak couldn’t help but chuckle at one of the animated doodles. 

[ ](https://imgur.com/G4F3wkZ)

“Are these yours?” he asked, fully knowing they must be since they had the same offbeat sense of humor as the cartoon he had seen in the Prophet, but of course he wasn’t supposed to know about that.

“They are,” Even said offhandedly, throwing himself into a seat with practiced ease, long limbs arranged carelessly.

There were deep window seats with what looked like plush transfigured cushions, and Isak made himself comfortable on the one across from Even. Taking a swig of the proffered Firewhiskey, he hid his wince at the unavoidable burn by casting his eyes out of the window toward the darkening sky and changing leaves of the Forbidden Forest stretching into the horizon. From this height he could see the Herbology glasshouses easily, black shapes of students moving like ants inside. Someone was practicing on the Quidditch pitch, but there was no telling which team it was. The whole scene could have been on a postcard advocating Scottish tourism, broomsticks aside.

The view outside, however, paled in comparison to the vision right in front of him.

In the pale afternoon light coming through the window, Isak could see, to his delight, details that their first meeting in the darkened courtyard had robbed him of. Tiny moles, too many to count, dotted the sides of Even’s face in constellations that Isak was desperate to learn. The afternoon sun cast steep valleys from his high cheekbones and teased out the yellow hiding in his hair.

As much as he loved seeing Even smiling, it somehow felt even more significant to see him staring off into the sky. This was Even without any pretenses—he just  _ was _ . His eyes were darker, more serious, but even more lovely for it. 

Isak wondered what caused that severity, what had happened to him to make him put up his cheerful shields, so different from Isak’s own detached defenses. 

Even caught him looking, and for a moment they just stared, blue eyes meeting green. 

Even broke the silence. “So what do you think of Vilde’s new HUG proposition?”

At the moniker, Isak groaned. “Fuck, do we have to call it that? I can’t take anything seriously with a name like that.” 

“Is someone scared of a hug, Isak? Do you need one right now?” Even was teasing, but Isak’s heart fluttered at the thought of those sinewy arms wrapped around him, holding him close. He shook the thought from his head.

“Pssh, I’m not scared of them, it just sounds dumb,” he countered lamely, passing the bottle back.

Even rolled his eyes, the gesture incorporating his whole body. “Fine, what do you think of Vilde’s  _ common room sharing _ proposal?”

“I think it’d be good,” Isak admitted. “Not that I want a bunch of other people hanging around all of the time, but it’d be nice to have somewhere to go hang out. Since Magnus can’t get into our common room, we’re stuck in either the Great Hall or the library.”

“What’s with this house thing anyway? I get here and they shove a hat on my head, tell me I’m nice, and send me to Magnus.”

“Yeah it’s a bit bullshit. When we first came here it was good to have Jonas and Mahdi so close, but people aren’t just one thing, you know?” Isak didn’t think he was imagining the look of fervent approval on Even’s face. 

They settled into easy conversation, the alcohol easing the way. They talked of everything and nothing—Norway, the differences in Scotland, what music they listen to.

As Even spoke, he punctuated his sentences with easy touches, light punches and prods, but also the occasional pat that maybe went on a bit too long to be platonic, at least in Isak’s experience. He teased comfortably, joking around like they had known each other for years instead of days.

[](https://imgur.com/FS2NW8I)

Isak could feel himself landing in the dangerous territory of… comfort. He could see himself doing this—sitting with Even, maybe moving closer to Even, orbiting each other with ease. He hadn’t felt this alive around anyone before. He found himself reciprocating the gestures and smiling more genuinely than he could remember doing for a long time. Something about Even’s presence brought out a side of Isak that he had been missing since everything with his parents had forced him to grow up sooner than most.

Isak almost fell out of his seat laughing as they tried to work around the secrecy statute from Durmstrang. Every time Even tried to tell him something, anything, about the school, his voice just suddenly stopped working, even mid sentence. It was efficient for keeping an air of mystery, but looked absolutely ridiculous in practice, Even’s eyes disappearing into squints as he laughed soundlessly. 

Isak was teasingly trying to figure out Even’s favorite Durmstrang professor when they were interrupted by an owl tapping on the window. Even eased open the window, letting in a blast of cool air as he put out his arm to help his pet.

“What kind of owl is that?” The small hazelnut-colored bird had tufts of feathers that created a sort of flat hat on his head. Frankly, it was adorable and an utterly unsurprising choice for Even, who couldn’t do anything that wasn’t different.

“A Eurasian pygmy owl. His name is Baz,” he said fondly, stroking its back. Once the owl had gotten its treat, he hopped hopefully over to Isak, who salvaged one of his own stale owl biscuits out of his bag and proffered it to the strange little bird.

He looked up from giving Baz head scritches to track Even’s face falling as he read the note that had been attached to the bird’s leg. 

“Shit, I forgot, I have to meet my girlfriend in Hogsmeade. Walk down with me?” 

Isak almost missed the last part of the sentence, struck dumb at the word “girlfriend.” 

He had never understood when people said they were shattered; he always thought they must have been exaggerating. Now, though, he could swear that his whole sense of self that had been building during this stolen afternoon had broken into tiny pieces, falling in slow motion to crash around his feet. 

He must have imagined it—the flirting, the touching, the sharing. Of course it meant something to  _ him _ —he was desperate and touch-starved. Even was just being friendly, and Isak had turned it into something it wasn’t.  _ Pathetic _ .

Through Even’s rambling, he learned her name—Sonja—how she still lived in Norway but would Floo to Hogsmeade to visit. Serious, then. The pieces of Isak’s heart sank further.

Isak’s body moved of its own accord, following Even down the seemingly endless spiral stairs and giving mechanical answers whenever prompted, avoiding Even’s concerned face, his brightness dimmed and a furrow creasing his brow. As soon as they got to the base of the stairs, Isak made his frail excuses and ran off in what was certainly the incorrect direction to get to the dungeons, but correct in that it was away from Even and the traitorous way his body had let him hope. 

“Isak, wait!” 

Even caught up to him down the hallway, grabbing his arm. They just stood there for a moment, Isak’s skin burning from where Even was still holding him. He didn’t seem to know what to say, even though he had been the one to chase after Isak. Finally, he said, “She and I have been together for a long time.”

Isak had no idea how that was supposed to make him feel better. If anything, it was worse. “Okay,” he said, attempting to sound unaffected.

Even continued, “Though lately, I’ve been feeling us growing apart. But she came all this way, so...”

For a moment they just stood there, sharing space in the dim hallway. At Even’s renewed proximity, Isak felt his shattered confidence weakly regrouping. Still, the existence of Sonja burned, and Isak kept his head down, not trusting himself to look at Even, to see if the moment meant the same thing to him—to get his hopes up again. 

Isak felt the ghost of Even’s breath caressing his lips as he leaned in, impossibly closer, bringing his clean, fresh scent along with him, invading Isak’s defenses. There could be no mistaking  _ this _ , right? Isak was lost in it, the possibility of Even. He was about to give in, to turn his head to catch those plush lips he had memorized in all their configurations, when there was a pointed cough from a portrait of a knight nearby. The boys broke apart at the sound, Even’s hand falling away. 

Finally remembering himself and Sonja, he ran. This time, Even didn’t follow. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's [Baz](https://www.owlpages.com/owls/species.php?s=1850), if you're curious.


	3. The Boy with the Halo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A double date ditched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for your support for this! Note the rating increase :-)

Isak wasn’t sure how he had gotten himself into this predicament. 

“So what’s it like being graduated?” Emma chirped from next to him. 

From across the table, Sonja—who was beautiful, of course whoever had Even would be beautiful—was giving some answer that Isak truly wasn’t listening to, too disappointed that after all of his anticipation, their evening in Hogsmeade had ended up...like  _ this _ .

* * *

“Halla Isak! Are you going to Hogsmeade on Saturday?”

Isak didn’t know why he thought that near miss last weekend was the end of it. It’s not as if it’s that large of a school, after all. He’s actually surprised that he made it until Tuesday without a run in.

Even had approached him in the library where he was attempting his reading for Transfiguration. He had torn his gaze from his textbook, startled to see the preoccupation of most of his waking thoughts (and some of the non-waking ones as well) gazing back at him with raised eyebrows from the other side of the worn table. 

It took a moment for the question to register. He stuttered, “uh, yeah, I’m actually not sure?”

“We should hang out when we get there, maybe get a drink?” Even asked. His long lines made the uniform look better than it had any right to, but his slicked back hair had one strand just out of place. Isak was dying to fix it. 

“Sure.” He tried not to seem too enthusiastic but probably missed by a mile. Perhaps he should have learned his lesson, but the prospect of spending more time alone with Even sent his heart rate spiking. 

“Great. I’ll see you there.” Even was off with a truly terrible wink. Isak never stood a chance.

* * *

Oddly enough, he was at the same table, this time with his Potions partner, Sana, when the scroll he was working on was darkened by a much shorter shadow. 

“Hi Isak! I ran into Even, you know, from HUG? And his girlfriend said that we should all hang out in Hogsmeade this weekend, what do you think?” Emma’s voice was piercing compared to the quiet of the library on a Friday afternoon, and, if Isak was being honest, compared to Even’s deep, warm rumble.

“Uhm, okay? If that’s what Even said,” Isak replied, applying a poorly constructed mask over his confusion. Did he miss the part of Even’s invitation that implied this was a double date? All of the visions of them strolling through Hogsmeade, messing around at the Shrieking Shack, sharing a drink at The Three Broomsticks abruptly vanished.

“Cool, I’ll meet you at the gates at 3?” 

She was gone before he even had a chance to reply. Sana only looked bemused at the horrified expression that had taken over his face, which only served to make him more flustered. 

“Back to love potions,” he said firmly, gesturing to their open textbooks.

Sana only bestowed him with a knowing smile. “Oh, I don’t think she needs one of those,” she said around barely suppressed laughter. 

Isak just sank down in his chair, hand shielding his face from the world. “ _ Fuck _ .” 

* * *

And now here they were, awkwardly crammed into one of the plush corner booths at Madam Puddifoot’s. These particular booths were coveted real estate for snogging couples—Isak had nightmares about all of the times he had endured them to wingman for his friends. 

Out of physical necessity he was pressed up close to Emma— _ wrong _ — _ wrong _ — and if he looked up he would make eye contact with Even, who was looking unfairly handsome in a denim jacket, so he made sure to not do that. He didn’t know what would be betrayed on his face if he did. The most he could see was Even’s big hands, finely detailed musculature gripping his drink and lifting the alcohol perhaps more frequently than usual. He could feel those blue eyes on him though, trying to catch his eye. 

The girls were carrying the conversation on their own with remarkable ease for total strangers. It’d be impressive if their presence at all wasn’t so inconvenient. 

“Wow, you’re only in your fifth year? I would never have guessed!” Sonja was saying. Isak couldn’t look at her without shame sweeping through him, like if she saw his eyes she would see all of his forbidden feelings for Even written plain as day.

The normally effusive Even was subdued, essentially ignoring the chattering girls in favor of the glass in his hand. Maybe he didn’t want this either, Isak selfishly hoped.

Sonja was still talking, somehow. “So I know your school has these groups...houses? And Even is in the friendly one. Which ones are you two in?” 

“Well I’m in Gryffindor, and Isak is in Slytherin. It’s very controversial,” Emma said, clinging to Isak’s arm and making doe eyes at him. Isak knew where this was going. 

“And why’s that?” Sonja asked. 

“Well Gryffindors and Slytherins have different...reputations. You know, from the war. Most Slytherins were on You-Know-Who’s side,” Emma ended in a confidential tone, like she was sharing some gossip instead of condemning a whole group of essentially children. 

“Does that make you the bad guy, Isak?” Sonja asked, a glint to her eye that froze Isak to his seat.  _ She can’t know, _ he told himself.

“Maybe I just like bad boys,” Emma teased. Isak groaned internally.

Even finally cut in. “Isak couldn’t be the bad guy if he tried. Don’t you think that’s a bit oversimplifying it?”

“I guess,” Emma mumbled, shrinking back a bit in her seat. 

Noticing Even’s newly-drained drink, Sonja chided, “Hey, I don’t think you should be having more. You know it interferes with your potions.” 

In a serious voice that chilled the air, Even told her, “Stop monitoring me. I mean it.” 

Silence descended over the booth. Radiating indignance, Sonja excused herself, Emma following soon after in some sort of unspoken code of female bonding.

Isak fumbled for something to break the awkward tension.

“So the Quidditch match tomorrow is supposed to be pretty good, that Ravenclaw chaser is—”

“Let’s get out of here,” Even interrupted.

“And go where?” Isak spared a glance toward the back hall, from which the girls would be emerging any moment.

“Anywhere.” Even was already scooting out of the booth. 

Isak knew in the back of his mind that if he did this, it was a deliberate choice that there was no turning back from. He couldn’t leave Emma there, cause a scene in  _ Madam Puddifoot’s _ of all places, without word getting around. But at this moment, he didn’t care. 

He tossed a couple of galleons on the table and followed his personal enigma out of the heavily perfumed air, and instead of the expected clench of guilt, he only felt free. 

* * *

They ran most of the way back to the castle, laughing in the thrill of their escape. The night air around them was buzzing with possibilities. It seemed even the moon was on their side, the bright glow generously lighting their path.

When they were back on the sturdy flagstones of the castle, Isak finally thought to ask where they were going. Even’s answer, was, of course, the least thing Isak would have expected.

“I feel like a swim,” he said, raising his eyebrows. “Do you?” 

“A swim?!” The only place to swim at Hogwarts was the Black Lake, and there was no way he was getting in there at night. 

“Yeah, a swim. I know a place, c’mon.” And he was off.

Isak was helpless to resist the pull of Even’s gravity. He followed him along another maze of corridors to the fifth floor corridor, where they stopped in front of a confused looking statue. Even gave a password—cedarwood—and the statue moved aside, revealing a door.

They entered a large bathing room, at the center of which was a swimming pool sized bathtub lined by a hundred taps. Stained glass mermaids stood sentry along the walls, grooming themselves despondently.

“How do you know about this?” Isak asked.

“I may have heard some prefects talking about it. It’s fine, they’re all in Hogsmeade.” 

Even stooped down, turning some of the shiny brass taps seemingly at random until the pool filled with a chaotic mixture of colors and scents. As he shucked off his outer layers, stripping down to his t-shirt and boxers (Isak thought he might combust), he watched the progress of the pool, seemingly mesmerized by the swirling of colors. The pool filled improbably quickly, heat radiating off of it and steam starting to swirl on the surface.

Isak watched the water reflecting in Even’s eyes, trying to come up with a reasonable excuse to  _ not _ go for a swim the forbidden prefect’s bath, but all that came out was a series of scoffs and stutters. 

Even, however, was not to be deterred. He turned the full force of that beseeching gaze onto Isak.

“What, don’t want to mess up your hair?” he teased.

“Excuse me?” Isak scoffed, but he was already pulling off his hoodie.

When he looked back at Even, he was pleased to see that the taller boy’s eyes were stuck on the strip of stomach that had been revealed. He visibly shook himself. 

“Or can you not swim? It’s not that deep,” he said, this time with much less bravado.

“Are you kidding me?  _ Me _ , not able to swim? I bet I can stay under longer than you.” 

Isak was running out of excuses and willpower to resist Even’s glittering eyes. He shoved the taller boy into the water, disturbing the colors so that for a moment, Even was surrounded by a rippling rainbow in a moment of perfect symbolism.

Letting go of his inhibitions (and any pretense of heterosexuality), he took the plunge, warm water enveloping him. He hit the bottom gently and pushed himself back up, gasping for air. He swiveled his head around searching in vain for Even, but he had yet to surface. 

Showing off a bit, he set off a bubble head charm and floated down to see Even’s face contorted in indignation at the wandless spell, hair floating about him in a halo. He looked even more striking here underwater, through the filter of colorful water. The light from above reflected through, playing rainbows over his skin. 

They hovered there, just grinning at each other, until a look of determination came over Even’s face and he swam forward, arms outstretched, to clumsily invade Isak’s bubble charm and press his lips against Isak’s. The shock and abruptness of it made Isak lose his concentration, and he rushed to the surface. 

“Oh you cheated!” he yelled in faux anger, elation suffusing his entire body. He couldn’t keep the smile off of his face even if he tried. 

“What?! Nei,  _ you _ cheated!” Even laughed, playing along.

“You never said we couldn’t use magic!” Isak pointed out.

“Let’s go again,” Even replied, eyes going dark.

They slipped back under the water, Isak reinstating his bubble charm. This time, however, /he was the one to press forward and, with no hesitation, kiss Even. 

In all of the times he had pictured this moment, and this was the least way he expected it to happen, he thought it would be awkward. His experience with kissing was that it was a performance: you follow these steps until you can stop. 

Kissing Even was not like that. It was Fiendfyre—devouring, all consuming. It was a revelation. It’s amazing how different something can be when you actually want it. 

They came together, again and again, sharing breath and air. Tongues coming out to play, tracing seams. Even’s hands were  _ finally _ on him, in his hair, clutching him closer, like he couldn’t get enough of him.  _ Him _ . 

He was suddenly very glad they were in water, because he didn’t know if he would have been able to stand. 

For his own part he got his hands on that pale skin, felt the shape of his bones, the flex of his muscles. He didn’t think he could ever get enough.

Isak had drawn back slightly, ready to dive back into that soft, warm heat, when out of the corner of his eye he saw the hazy shape of...a girl? More specifically, a bespectacled girl  _ ghost _ , who looked positively titillated by the show they were inadvertently putting on for her. He drew back further, alerting Even, who had been drifting back to him, a moth to a flame. 

“Oh, don’t stop on my account!” They heard her obnoxiously high voice clearly through the water. 

They looked at each other in surprise and simultaneously burst back up to fresh air, clambering out of the pool as fast as possible, feet skidding on the tiles. He snatched up their clothes, and, after applying a hasty drying charm, they redressed and got out of there, laughing all the while. 

* * *

Isak snuck them into the Slytherin dorm, common room luckily devoid of students, and tugged Even along the hallway to his room. He found himself wishing for the first time that he had tidied up; it was a bit of a disaster from the week and getting dressed earlier. There’s only so much that house elves can do in face of a stressed Isak, it seemed.

Luckily, Even only had eyes for Isak, insistent hands lingering on any part of him that they could reach. They undressed to their shirts and boxers and clambered into bed, green light from the lake tinting the room and dimly lighting their way, but it seemed their bodies knew the path even without it.

Isak was amazed at how well they fit. He would have thought two older boys in one of these dorm room beds would have been pushing it, but they slotted together easily, Isak under Even’s arm, leg folded between the other’s long limbs. 

The way they fit together perfectly also had the mind-blowing effect of perfectly aligning their hardening cocks. If Isak was being honest, he had been at least semi-hard since Even had taken his sweatshirt off at the pool. 

After going so long without and days of picturing what he’d do if he finally got his hands on Even, Isak was ill prepared to restrain himself, and it appeared that Even was similarly affected. Isak thrilled in the feeling of Even’s hardness rubbing against his hip, the idea that  _ he  _ was the one who did that. 

Bracing himself above Even, he dug his fingers into his hair (finally—it was just as silky as he had imagined) as they writhed together. There was no finesse, no skill to this—only a race toward orgasm that had been started weeks previously. 

Even’s tongue was fucking into Isak’s mouth, and the suggestion of it combined with the friction on his neglected cock were enough to bring him over the edge as he thrusted against Even’s hip, biting Even’s lip and moaning loudly as he emptied himself into his boxers. The wet heat was enough to help Even, who only had to give one, two thrusts before he too was coming, Isak’s name on his lips. 

They lay there, panting into each others’ mouths and kissing languidly. Even stretched for his wand, performing a quick cleaning spell so that they wouldn’t be sticky all night. 

They were still kissing, but the urgency was gone, now that everything was out in the open. This was exploring, rather than devouring. Learning the other person, memorizing the shape of their lips, their body. Connecting moles, falling down slopes and curves.

Even’s lips were plush and soft; they pressed against his lips, his skin, placing indulgent kisses everywhere, reassuring them both.

Isak conjured a quick  _ lumos _ so that he could see, that he knew who he was with, that this wasn’t a dream. Those eyes were twinkling at him from centimeters away, rather than meters. He could see a multitude of shades of blue in them, how they went from indigo on the outside to a light blue in the center. 

Best of all, however, was how Even responded to finally having permission to touch. His hands were everywhere and it seemed he couldn’t stop kissing Isak, staring at him like he couldn’t believe it was happening. Like he felt just as lucky as Isak did.

As well as he thought they got along before, it was nothing compared to their chemistry once there was no ambiguity about how they felt. 

They stayed up all night talking and kissing, talking and kissing. Isak was tucked under one of Even’s long arms, protected from the world and within perfect kissing distance. All he could see was Even.

[ ](https://imgur.com/tKCQr8k)

When the sun started reflecting into the room, Isak had to send a note to Eskild, making excuses for missing their weekly Saturday breakfast get together. 

“So why do you stay here over breaks?” Even asked. 

Isak tried to find a way to explain it without revealing too much. He only just  _ got  _ Even, if he even did have him: he wasn’t about to scare him off. 

“There was some stuff going on at home, so I just didn’t want to be there anymore. Eskild—you know Eskild, he’s in your year in Hufflepuff—found me upset about it and talked me into staying here with him. He thinks he’s some sort of parental figure for me now.” 

“Is he right?” Even asked seriously.

“I guess he is. Maybe more like a big brother. It’s nice, I guess, to have someone care.” Isak promptly shut himself up, realizing he had probably said more than was attractive. 

Even’s only response was to tighten his arms around Isak’s smaller frame and drop a kiss into his curls.

They dozed off and on during the day, living off of the junk food Isak had squirreled away in his trunk. Conversations ranged from the surface level—Even describing his favorite romantic Muggle films, comparing their Patronus forms ( _ my phoenix is way cooler than your lynx, are you kidding? _ )—to the esoteric. 

“Divination is your favorite subject?” Isak squawked in outrage. “Of all of the amazing magic, why  _ that _ one?!”

This drew a warm chuckle out of Even, Isak feeling the vibrations more than hearing the sound. “Well I don’t necessarily mean the type of stuff that we learn here, tea leaves and that bullshit. It’s just the idea of it, you know? Your future, all of your decisions, written somewhere like a screenplay.” 

Isak wasn’t entirely sure what a screenplay was, but the whole enterprise sounded like a lot of pressure to him. “I don’t know. What I find really interesting are parallel universes. Like each decision isn’t the worst thing in the world, because in another universe you tried it another way.”

Even broke eye contact at this, that same severity Isak had noticed previously coming back to line his face. 

After a long moment, Even replied, “I don’t know. It sounds a bit lonely to me. If nothing we do matters, then why do we bother? We just end up alone.” 

“That’s dark. If anything, it means you’re less alone. There are other Isaks and Evens, maybe in one we’re Muggles? Or we’re in different houses? Or we still live in Norway? There’s never one where I’m a Hufflepuff though,” he joked, trying to bring some of the levity back. 

It seemed to work, because Even’s smile finally came back. He whispered, almost to himself,

“I bet they’re all as happy as this, though.” 

At his words, Isak felt something shift. He knew when he came out of that water, he felt like a different person. One who knew who he was and what he wanted. And most importantly, that he shouldn’t be ashamed of that. For once, he  _ did  _ feel like he could be happy.

“Yeah, I bet they are.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!


	4. The Disapparating Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A false start.

Isak's consciousness surfaced slowly, clinging adamantly to the vestiges of sleep. 

When his brain caught up to him, though, he realized that it wasn’t just a dream—he  _ had _ kissed Even, been kissed by Even, and they  _ had _ spent a whole night and day together. In his bed of all places.

For once, he was excited to open his eyes and face the day. 

Unfortunately, the light of day paled to his expectations. Even was gone, leaving only his scent on the pillow cradling a note. 

The disappointment curled low in his gut, even as he watched the animation of himself sleeping and Even swimming out the window, apologizing for leaving. 

[](https://imgur.com/549ErBT) [](https://imgur.com/5NV7gtY)

Still, he could smell Even in his bed, feel his phantom touches, the pressure against his skin. Reaching into his boxers, he slowly stroked himself, basking in the smell, the memories—in the potential of more.

Even’s dripping torso came to mind, wet shirt clinging to his frame. His kiss-bitten mouth, the feeling of his hands playing a symphony on Isak’s skin.

Isak sped up his strokes, twisting up at the end, the familiar motion belied by the lingering imprint of Even pressed up against him, his frantic kisses burning into Isak’s skin. Those lithe muscles flexing, driving their bodies together, 

It was the echo of Even’s voice moaning _ Isak _ as he came that pushed him over the edge, spilling into his hand.

He stared at the ceiling until his empty stomach forced him from his bed. 

Dressing languidly, he felt himself coming back down to earth. He realized that he had gone essentially missing, and that his friends were bound to be looking for him. 

He went down to the Great Hall for lunch (of course he had missed breakfast). Luckily his friends were chronic late risers too, so he plunked down next to Jonas, stomach growling at the welcome smell of real food. Magnus was at the Slytherin table, as always. When he first started this practice there were whispers from all four tables, but now no one batted an eye. Even better, other students started mixing up the tables as well. 

Isak’s arrival drew a chorus of exclamations. 

“What the fuck dude!” Magnus near-yelled, the volume swivelling heads toward their direction. “Where have you been?”

Jonas chimed in, “We know you weren’t with Emma, she’s been complaining about you all weekend.” 

“Sorry, I just had some stuff I had to do. How was the match?” He used his sandwich as a shield to avoid the onslaught of further questions.

He felt badly for lying, but until he knew where he stood with Even he couldn’t risk it. 

His friends exchanged glances like they knew he was lying, but they were going to let it slide.

They started into a play by play of the match, which Isak tried to muster regret for missing. He couldn’t, though, not with his head full of Even. 

Speaking of whom, Isak did a quick search of the Great Hall for that signature blond coif, but he was nowhere to be found.  _ He probably just ate earlier or is catching up on homework. I’ll see him later,  _ Isak reasoned. Fuck, he wasn’t going to turn into a clingy— _ whatever— _ just based off of one night with someone.

Tuning back into the recap, he jumped in to tease Magnus with the others about the Hufflepuff loss. Inter-house cooperation be damned—this was Quidditch. 

He spent the rest of the day with his friends, but part of his mind was always back in his bed, wrapped in Even.

* * *

Isak felt like a ghoul lurking outside of the Arithmancy classroom the following Tuesday, but he knew that Even was supposed to be in there. He had yet to see him since Saturday night, which seemed improbable for a school this size, which normally felt more like a fishbowl than anything.

He hung back as casually as possible, watching the students file out and getting increasingly frustrated when he didn’t spy Even. 

When Eskild inevitably spotted him, the older boy was all stern admonishments for breaking their Saturday tradition. “But I’m sure you had a good reason,” he said slyly. 

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Isak evaded. “Hey, have you seen Even today?”

“He hasn’t been in classes at all actually,” Eskild said, a knowing smile taking over his face. “Is he why you–” 

“Thanks Eskild, bye Eskild!” Isak threw over his shoulder as he ran away from  _ that  _ particular conversation.

Where the fuck was Even? Isak’s mind was overrun with possibilities about why he was being avoided. Is he sick? Did he regret everything? Did he go back to Sonja? 

No matter what, Isak couldn’t come up with an excuse that worked in his favour. If Even wanted to be with him, he would have owled if something was actually wrong. That only left the alternative. 

* * * 

Thursday night found Isak flying high above the Quidditch pitch, chill wind rifling through his curls. He thought concentrating on not falling would be enough to drive the worries out of his head, but unfortunately it hadn’t worked yet. 

He was practicing a series of feints when he saw a familiar shape waiting on the sidelines. Even was bundled up against the cold ( _ or against me _ , Isak’s traitorous mind supplied). He motioned for Isak to land and walked over to the Quidditch changing room. 

With a swooping stomach that had little do with the loss of altitude, Isak landed softly on the ground, following Even, as ever. 

He kept himself guarded, prepared for the worst that this conversation could bring, but he couldn’t stop his eyes from roving over Even’s form, checking for injuries. His face looked a bit more gaunt under his hat and hood, more somber, but otherwise he seemed alright. 

“Where were you?” Isak finally asked, when it seemed nothing else was forthcoming. 

“I, uh. I told Sonja about you.” A pause, a skipped heartbeat. “We decided to go on a break,” Even said. 

Isak kept a firm hold on his emotions; there was still room for this to hurt. 

Even must have misinterpreted Isak’s blank face, because he treaded lightly. 

“How do you feel about that?”

Isak allowed himself to show just a fraction of his elation. “ _ Awesome _ ,” he confessed, and he could feel the grin taking over. “Unless, you know, you’re sad about it or something.” 

At this, Even’s smile finally showed itself. “You really think I’m sad? No, I’m not sad,” he said, finally closing the distance between them, 

Cradling Isak’s face in his large hands, he kissed him soundly.

The moment those plush lips brushed his the floodgates opened, and all of the feelings he had repressed took over. He couldn’t keep the smile off of his face as Even pulled back to look at him.

There was a beat when all they did was breathe together. 

[ ](https://imgur.com/YmPI7ve)

<a href="https://imgur.com/YmPI7ve"><img src="https://i.imgur.com/YmPI7ve.gif" title="source: imgur.com" /></a>

“How do you think your parents would feel if you got together with me?” Even said after a moment. He said it carefully, like this was some sort of test. 

Isak took a moment to figure out how to phrase it, his mother’s ranting letters playing through his thoughts. “Well, my dad would be fine. My mom, it doesn’t matter.” 

“You don’t talk to your mom?” Even asked.

“Not really,” Isak lied, the truth a complicated thing. “She’s actually kind of a freak.” He said it as casually as possible, like it didn’t matter to him. No one wanted to know about his bitten mom and her affliction.

“How is she a freak?” Even asked seriously. Isak couldn’t read him, but he assumed he was weighing it against him. He could almost see it being thrown into the Reasons Not to Date Isak pile.

“She got attacked by a rogue vampire when I was younger, and it just drove her out of her mind. She’s at St. Mungo’s now.” 

Even’s face now was complicated. A mixture of sadness and—confirmation, almost. Isak didn’t know what it was, but he knew he didn’t want Even to look like that. 

“What about your parents?” Isak asked, trying to change the conversation.

There was a long pause, then Even finally exhaled. “They would have loved you.” He pulled Isak into a kiss, dispelling Isak’s concerns. 

Isak only had a second to wonder about the tense of that sentence when there was the sound of yelling outside—one of the Quidditch teams must be coming to practice. 

Even broke away, nodding before he disappeared out the door. Isak couldn’t help the smile tucked in his cheek for the rest of the day.

* * *

As Isak was heading back to the Slytherin common room, he ran into Eskild, and this time there was no escaping the conversation. He was full to bursting anyway; he had to tell someone. 

Eskild was surprisingly not suprised at all by the news that Isak was 1) gay and 2) with Even. 

“Isak, I have eyes. I can see the way you look at him. Also, I can see the way he looks at you,” he said, putting a familiar arm around Isak’s shoulders as they chatted in an alcove.

“I’m happy for you. I know your parents haven’t been there for you, but the thing with your mom isn’t your fault. There’s a lot to love behind all that grumpy,” he punctuated with a pinch to the cheek. 

Isak hated him a bit for seeing through him so easily, but he also appreciated the validation. He didn’t know how much of him had believed he didn’t deserve to be happy until that moment. 

“Plus, he’s pretty handsome,” Eskild teased. “You know I share a room with him? Those shoulders—”

“Enough, Eskild!” Isak admonished, but it was undercut by his wide smile.

“Guru knows,” Eskild said with a wink.

* * *

Isak stayed on his cloud of happiness until the next day. He was sitting in the Great Hall finishing his dinner when Baz flew over to him. Isak was pleased to see him since he hadn’t heard from Even since the day before. Now that he knew what he was missing, he was loathe to go without.

“Hei Isak,” it started. “Thanks for your note. I’m sorry about this, but I think we moved too fast. It’s just not a good idea. I’ll see you around.” 

Isak fought to school his face to hide the rising tide of humiliation, conscious of his friends’ inquiring gazes. They were curious enough about the strange bird that they were all taking turns playing with. He brushed off their worries, slinging his bag over his shoulder and making his way as quickly as was believable out of the Great Hall. 

He could feel himself falling and crashing as he pounded his way down the steps. What was it about Even that let him do this? He had his walls built for a reason, he told himself as he surreptitiously brushed away tears. All it took was one boy, one night, and he let this happen. 

Dashing through the common room, he didn’t let his momentum stop until he was safely inside his room. He sank back against the door, remembering at the sight of it what memories his bed held. 

He just couldn’t understand what went wrong. He saw him yesterday, and they were going to be together. He hadn’t even spoken to him today, but he somehow screwed things up?

It must have been the thing about his mom. No one wants someone with that much baggage.

He knew he shouldn’t have said anything.

* * * 

For as happy as Isak had been just a few days ago, now he was despondent to the same degree. He went through his routine, sure, but without feeling any of it. Even, of course, was still around, but he deftly avoided Isak. 

His friends were obviously concerned and worked hard to make sure he wasn’t alone too often, but there was only so much that they could do. 

They resolved to take him out with them on Saturday, showing up at his door and forcing him into a flannel, shoving a snapback on his head. 

They arrived at The Three Broomsticks, which was crowded with students. Studiously avoiding Emma, Isak trailed after his friends to a secluded table in the corner. Jonas managed to score them a few beers from the busty waitress, and those combined with the flask of Firewhiskey they had been passing back and forth on the walk down combined to put Isak in a haze. 

He was sullenly sagged in his chair until he saw a flash of wheat-coloured hair a head above everyone else on its way toward the door. With a jolt he was up and moving, ignoring his friends’ calls. 

Hopefully he could get some answers, so he could stop playing it over and over.  _ Maybe I can make him change his mind _ , whispered that small part of Isak that couldn’t learn its lesson.

He had finally pushed his way up to the door when he finally spotted Even again, but he immediately wished he hadn’t. No matter what answers he thought he wanted, he hadn’t wanted this. 

Even was stopped just outside the door, and Sonja was walking up to him. With practiced ease she leaned in and kissed him. Worst of all was that Even  _ let  _ her. They took off down the sidewalk, arm in arm. 

Isak stood there, rooted to the spot. Emma was walking out at the same time, and the look she gave him should have petrified him immediately. 

He muttered an insufficient apology and, in a daze, made his way back to his friends. He sat back, downing his drinks while the boys chatted, throwing concerned looks his way every so often. Over the next few hours he proceeded to get thoroughly hammered, hoping that the next beer or shot would be the one to force that replaying image—Sonja kissing Even, Even kissing Sonja—to finally erase itself. 

The boys helped him back to the castle, his arm slung around Jonas’ shoulders as they staggered along the path. They got halfway before the boys realized he was too drunk to be stealthy getting back into the castle, so Jonas reluctantly performed a sobering charm, leaving Isak both dehydrated and ashamed. 

Jonas looked at him with sympathy. “I know dude, that spell is the worst. But it’s now or in the morning.” 

They made it through the castle without incident. When they finally got back to the dorm, Jonas pulled Isak away from his door and down the hall to his own identical (yet decidedly cleaner) room.

“Let’s just sleep over, like we used to when we were first years,” Jonas said. 

Isak was too tired and heartbroken to complain. He just collapsed onto the magically expanded bed, curling into himself. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Isak! Let me know what you think!


	5. The Boy with the String

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak’s friends worry about him. Isak’s getting pretty worried too, to be honest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rating increase ;-)

Isak woke up to Jonas’s head of dark curls shading the pillow next to his. It looked like he was reading a Quidditch magazine while waiting for Isak to wake up. Ginny Weasley levelled a judgemental stare at him from the cover.

Isak smothered his face in his pillow, the burn of humiliation spreading through him at the memories of the display he put on the previous night, and how annoyed his friends must be with him. 

“Hey, man,” Jonas said tentatively, formidable eyebrows becoming one in their concern. “Want to tell me what was going on last night?” 

Isak didn’t know what to say. He  _ wanted _ to tell his best friend about everything going on with him, but he didn’t know how after all of the effort he’d put into hiding that part of himself. 

“It’s nothing,” he ventured. “Just some family stuff—”

“It’s fine if you just don’t want to tell me,” Jonas interrupted. “But I know it’s not that. Just know that I’m here for you when you do want to talk, okay? I want my best friend back.”

Isak swallowed, holding back tears at the show of support. He just nodded, not trusting his voice. 

The boys got dressed in silence and made their way down to breakfast, Jonas casting warning looks at the others who looked like they might want to ask questions. 

* * *

The week passed with Isak becoming more out of it with each passing day. When he tried to sleep each night, all he could do was torture himself with an infinitely looping playback of his greatest stressors. 

Even, smiling and kissing him in his bed.  _ Not happening again.  _

The last letter from his mom.  _ She needs me. _

Even kissing Sonja.  _ What did I do wrong? _

He went to class, he studied, he saw his friends, but he wasn’t really _ there _ . He couldn’t tell how much of the problem was because of Even, or if it was because he was keeping it all to himself. 

The thing about going to a small, niche boarding school, Isak was learning, was that you couldn’t avoid running into the people you least wanted to see. Before, when he was desperate to see Even, he only caught glimpses, blurs of blond hair and blue eyes. Now he was everywhere—in the Great Hall at lunch, lounging indolently in the corridors and laughing with his friends, looking like he was about to fall into a photoshoot. 

Isak felt irrationally angry at these displays. Of course  _ Even  _ wasn’t upset; he’s the one who did this. It was just such a contrast to Isak's black mood that it hurt him even more to see it hadn’t impacted Even at all.

* * * 

Isak was in Herbology, digging in his bag for his dragonhide gloves, when he came across a folded piece of parchment. He opened it out of curiosity to find one of Even’s cartoons. 

[](https://imgur.com/pvfEphe)

It was cute. Sweet, even. But what did it mean? Why bother sending notes to someone you have definitively shown you have no serious interest in. It didn’t make sense. 

For some reason, this was the last straw. If Even had just outright dumped him that would be one thing, but this hot and cold was another, keeping him up at night and distracting him at all times of the day. Isak couldn’t take it anymore. 

These feelings weren’t going away, and if it wasn’t Even (Isak ignored the pang this sent through him) it would be someone else. He may as well tell someone, get some of this weight off of his chest. 

He cornered Jonas after lunch. “Want to go flying? We haven’t done that in a while.” 

Jonas readily agreed, looking pleased that for once, Isak wasn’t actively avoiding a conversation.

They grabbed their brooms and outer layers from their rooms and headed over to the pitch, which was luckily empty. 

They started by passing the worn quaffle back and forth, but eventually they ended up just flying slowly alongside each other over the grounds and enjoying the quiet. 

Isak cleared his throat, trying to get up the nerve. “I know I’ve been weird lately. It’s because of someone I like.” At Jonas’s patient look, he continued, gathering his courage.

“I thought we had a thing going on, but then...  _ he _ broke it off with no explanation.”

Isak’s heart was in freefall as he waited for Jonas’s reaction. If Jonas was surprised, though, he did a good job of hiding it. 

“That’s shitty man, I’m sorry. Who was it?”

Isak’s heart landed lightly with a cushioning charm.

“You know the Hufflepuff transfer?” 

“Oh yeah, Even. Magnus won’t stop talking about him.” 

“Yeah, him.” Isak confirmed, confidence growing.

“So what’s going on with him then?” Jonas continued, as if there was nothing wrong.  _ Of course there’s nothing wrong. _

Isak replied, aiming for nonchalance, “Nothing, now. He got back together with his girlfriend. He leaves me these notes, though...” 

“Fuck that,” Jonas said decisively. “He needs to break up with her.” 

Isak couldn’t stop the grin from stretching across his face. He had known that Jonas would be fine with it, but he hadn’t realized how much it was costing him to keep such a big thing secret. 

“And you should tell the boys,” Jonas added. “They’ll be chill. Well, Magnus is never chill. But you know what I mean.” 

In that moment, it didn’t matter what happened with Even. 

* * *

Of course, the inevitable day came when they ran into each other in a way that couldn’t be avoided. 

Isak was fighting the chill and stray snowflakes as he trudged up the stairs to the owlery, letter to his mom in hand.

He made it near the top of the spiral stone steps when he nearly collided with a familiar lanky form. Isak briefly considered the merits of just tipping himself over the low railing. 

“Hei, Isak.” Even’s normally cheerful face was lined with apprehension, his eyes wide. 

_ Good _ . Isak thought. This should be uncomfortable for him too. 

“Hey,” Isak replied, chin down and trying to look anywhere but in Even’s eyes.

[ ](https://imgur.com/OoMu8mv)

[ ](https://imgur.com/lOKRowX)

The older boy was standing in the middle of the doorway, stranding Isak in the minefield of awkward conversation. 

“Sending a letter?” Even finally offered after a brief skirmish of glances. 

Isak only nodded, holding up the letter lamely as some sort of evidence.

“I’d say you could use Baz, but he’s on his way to Norway,” Even apparently felt the need to say.

_ Probably to Sonja, _ Isak supplied. 

To be polite, he replied, “It’s fine, I’m just going to use one of the school owls. It’s only going to my mamma in London, so.” He squared his shoulders, realizing the reference to his mom at the last moment. If Even wanted to have a problem with it, he could fuck right off.

Even registered it, slight confusion taking over his face for a moment. He quickly recovered, saying, “I don’t know, Baz probably would have appreciated the break. Maybe he could have done some sightseeing.” 

Isak chuckled lowly despite himself. He had a soft spot for the bird; who could blame him?

Even brightened at the sound, like it was some sort of absolution. He opened his mouth to start again, but Isak had remembered himself and why he was avoiding Even in the first place. 

“I gotta go.” 

He shoved past into the owlery, body lighting up at the brief contact with Even’s warm torso and hoping (not hoping?) that he wouldn’t follow.

* * *

Isak idly stared out of the open library window, neglected Transfiguration textbook opened in front of him.

Baz swooped in and landed in front of him, ruffling the pages of his textbook and drawing coos from neighboring students.

Isak considered ignoring the bird but Baz was insistent, butting his strange flat head against Isak’s arm. 

“Fine, fine,” he said, taking the note from the outstretched leg. Softening, he petted the bird. It wasn’t Baz’s fault that his owner couldn’t make up his mind. 

Unfolding the parchment, a thrill washing through him against his will, he watched the animation of Baz touring London. The animation was cute, but it was the two small words at the end that sank into his chest. Even had signed this one “P.S. Miss you”. 

[](https://imgur.com/xR4aTz1)

_ Miss you.  _

He had a weird way of showing it.

* * *

“This is awesome guys!  _ Couches _ !” Magnus yelled as he jumped onto one, jostling Mahdi as he launched himself onto the worn black leather.

Vilde had gotten something arranged with Professor McGonnagall so that on a trial basis people from other houses could visit each others’ common rooms, as long as they were invited by someone in that house. 

They immediately took advantage; for the first time they were hanging out in the Slytherin common room.

No one should resist chuckling at Magnus’ shenanigans. It  _ was _ pretty fantastic to get to hang out together wherever they wanted. 

“Oh man!” Magnus said. “I heard the funniest rumours about Isak today. Apparently, Emma is telling everyone that you’re gay?”

Isak’s stomach plummeted. That’s it, then. There’s no going back from that. 

“Why would that be funny, Mags?” Mahdi said. 

Jonas kept looking at Isak significantly. 

“Uh, because he’s not?” Magnus offered. 

Isak considered letting the moment pass, but it was going to have to happen eventually. 

He took a deep breath, jumping off the cliff. “Actually, I kind of am?” 

Beers were simultaneously lowered. 

“What?!” Magnus squawked. “Since when? You get chicks all the time.”

Isak just blustered, but luckily Mahdi was quick to point out that he could be bi, leading to a whole other side discussion and drawing the attention away as he sat there basking in relief. 

The conversation quickly devolved as they played a rambunctious game of Exploding Snap and tested some new Weasleys products.

Isak tried to stay present and enjoy his friends (not to mention try to keep his fingers), but his mind kept drifting. It was getting late when Jonas noticed him staring off into the fireplace and nudged him. 

“Hey. Anything new going on with Even?” 

“Even!” Magnus was quick to jump on his favorite subject. Realization dawned on his face. “Oh shit, the guy you were with was Even?! How did you manage that?! That guy is way cooler than you.” 

“Well I obviously didn’t,” Isak replied, not bothering to hide his bitterness. “He has a girlfriend.” 

Jonas cut in, “But hey, hasn’t he been sending you notes? He must still be interested.” 

“Yeah, just not interested enough,” Isak retorted. 

“Fuck that shit!” Magnus said. 

“Yeah,” agreed Mahdi. “Give him an ultimatum. He doesn’t get to just screw you around like that.”

Jonas nodded in sage agreement. 

Isak thought it over. It would be good to just get it over with. If Even wanted him, he’d do it. If he didn’t, at least Isak would know and could try to stop thinking about him all of the time .

With some difficulty he conjured his lynx Patronus, giving her a message to share with Even. “Thanks for the notes, but if you’re not serious about it then stop. You can let me know once you’ve broken up with your girlfriend.”

He watched her pounce through the wall as the boys cheered. 

Feeling better already, he started engaging with everyone, speculating on the next Quidditch game. 

A few minutes later, a red headed second year came through the door and nervously approached the group ensconced around the fireplace. 

“Hey, you’re Isak right? There’s a Hufflepuff outside, he wants to see you.” Having done her job, she skittered off away from the older boys.

Isak was dimly aware of the chorus of triumphant yelling coming from around him, but he found himself stuck. No part of him had expected Even to reply; even less likely was him showing up to see him. 

“Go, Isak!” Jonas prodded. 

Nervously, Isak walked over to the door, swinging it open to see Even standing there, looking as handsome as ever and leaning casually against the stone wall like this was an ordinary occurrence, but the look in his eyes betrayed a hint of nervousness. 

For a moment they just stood there, staring at each other. The tension between them was a solid thing; Isak could have touched it if he dared. Scenarios were flashing through his mind, blurring his thoughts. Above all, there was the blinding relief that Even was  _ here _ . He chose Isak, even if it was just for a night.

The sound of Magnus’ greeting (and the other boys’ admonishments for interrupting them) startled them both, Isak finally remembering that they had an audience.

Isak pulled Even into the room and, studiously ignoring the catcalls from his friends, beckoned for him to follow to his room. 

He wasn’t sure what he had expected to happen. If he had to guess, he would have assumed he would be mad at Even, all of the frustration of the past weeks bursting out of him. But from the second he had Even alone he didn’t seem to have a choice; his body moved of its own accord, taking Even’s face in his hands and kissing him, finally getting his lips back on Even’s, reasserting his place. 

Even responded enthusiastically, tugging him closer so that their bodies were flush together. They went full speed ahead, tongues delving into each others’ mouths, lips pressing everywhere they could reach. 

Their hands were everywhere, tugging at shirts, searching for skin. Isak knocked off his hat and pulled off his shirt, only breaking the connection from those plush lips for a moment as Even did the same.

Then finally it was skin on skin like it hadn’t been before. Isak felt sparks everywhere that he was touching Even. 

Even backed him up against the door, covering his body with his own. He only bracketed him for a moment before sinking to his knees, kissing his way down Isak’s body. 

Isak only had the presence of mind to cast a hurried  _ muffliato _ before Even was undoing the button on Isak’s jeans, biting at his hip while he opened the fly and took out Isak’s throbbing cock. 

Isak almost came on the spot, the image of Even on his knees looking so reverently at him was that staggering. 

After a moment’s deliberation, Even finally leaned forward, mouthing along the shaft in open mouthed kisses. When he got to the tip he gave a firm lick over the head, moaning at the taste of the precome leaking from Isak’s slit. 

This wasn’t the first time someone had wanted to give Isak a blowjob, but it was definitely the first time he had wanted one from the person giving it. He sank his hands into the carefully arranged coif bobbing in front of him, mussing it up as he gently cradled Even’s head. 

At the touch of his hands Even sped up, finally fitting his mouth over the head and sucking down half of Isak’s cock in one go. He rubbed at the base with one of his hands, the other still gripping Isak’s hip like a lifeline. He stroked up and down, increasing how much he took in his mouth until he had most of Isak’s cock enveloped in his wet mouth, removing his hand. Isak had to fight not to thrust forward. 

The feeling of Even’s lips tightened around his shaft was bringing Isak close to the edge quickly. He had barely reined himself in when Even looked up at him. Those blue eyes looking up at him with so much trust was too much for Isak; he tugged lightly at Even’s hair, trying to warn him, but Even stayed put, if anything moving faster and giving harder suction. With a shout Isak was coming into Even’s mouth, shooting long spurts that Even swallowed down eagerly. 

When Isak came down from his high he saw that Even’s cock was out of his khakis, and he was stripping it frantically. “Fuck, Even,” Isak groaned. He tugged him up, meaning to help, but he barely got a hand on that hot skin before Even was coming, painting white stripes on Isak’s abs.

“Sorry, you were just so hot, the noises you were making, the way you taste,” he said, leaning his forehead against Isak’s and panting against Isak’s cheek. Isak, overwhelmed by Even’s enthusiasm, pressed his lips against Even’s, tongue tracing along the seam of his mouth until he granted access, letting Isak taste himself. 

They stood there for a moment, braced against each other and sharing breath, bodies getting reacquainted. When Even seemed like he was about to say something, Isak just hushed him and tugged him toward the bed. They could deal with whatever tomorrow. He just wanted to have Even back, if only for a night.

When they settled into the bed, they slotted together as if nothing had happened. Isak drifted off to sleep, holding Even a bit more tightly. Maybe this time, if he held tightly enough, he could keep him.


	6. The Boy Who Lights the Way

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happiness is found.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The happy interval we all need right now. Enjoy!

When Isak started surfacing from sleep, he tried in vain to force himself back under, remembering the disappointment he felt the last time he woke after falling asleep with Even’s heartbeat steadily beating under his ear. He could feel that there was no one in the bed next to him, which didn’t help his sense of foreboding. 

He finally got the nerve up to open his eyes, trying not to be so crestfallen that, as he expected, the bed was empty and Even was nowhere to be seen. This time he didn’t even have a note to comfort himself with. There were, however, a few outer layers of clothing and.. Even’s wand?

Isak stood and picked up the wand (willow, it looked like—he wondered absently what was inside) and, out of curiosity, gave it a whirl, casting a basic  _ priori incantatem _ to see if it revealed a hint to where its owner had disappeared to. All it yielded was the time. Isak was surprised that it had worked at all—usually when he tried using other people’s wands, an explosion was more likely to occur than the intended outcome. 

He was still getting his bearings when he heard his door opening and turned, wand still in hand, to see the only thing that made sense, yet the least thing he expected. 

Even was toweling off his hair, looking freshly showered. When Even saw that Isak was awake, he greeted Isak with a warm “Halla!” and a bright smile, swooping in to kiss him soundly. 

He pulled back when Isak was too shell shocked to reciprocate. Even looked at his wand in Isak’s hand, quirking an eyebrow. 

“Is this because I used your shampoo?” he teased.

“I didn’t know where you had gone,” Isak mumbled. “I thought it was like last time.”

“Hey,” Even said, face getting serious. “I was right here, I just wanted to shower. I didn’t go anywhere.” He gave Isak one more kiss before turning and starting to fiddle with the wireless Isak had set up on his nightstand. 

Isak stood there, fighting against the wave of happiness taking over. He had to stay firm; he couldn’t be let down again. 

“Does Sonja know what you’re doing right now?” he asked, injecting more confidence than he felt into his voice. It was the least thing he wanted to ask about, but he knew he had to. 

“Fuck that. We aren’t together anymore.” 

Even said it so casually, like it was something that Isak should have taken for granted. 

Isak pushed, a final stand for self-preservation. “I can’t just forget about her. Last time you said you were broken up, I saw you kissing her only days later.” 

At these words, Even’s fingers halted in their fiddling. Isak felt a sick satisfaction at surprising him. 

Even resumed after a moment, saying carefully, “It’s hard with her. She only sees me as one thing, so she only treats me that way. I’m more than that. Right?” He gave the words weight, leveling his entreating gaze at Isak and bracing himself, like Isak’s answer could inflict bodily harm.

Isak thought for a moment, finding his response easily. 

“Nobody is just one thing. Only you can know.” 

The tension in the air lifted as Even smiled—clearly this was the right answer.

He tucked in close, bending slightly to meet Isak’s lips, arms wrapping around him. 

He pulled back slightly, a sincere look on his face, as if he could sense Isak’s crumbling reservations. His eyes were blown wide, eyebrows tented in his sincerity. “I’ve never felt this way. About anyone.” 

And at that simple statement, the walls were down. “Me neither,” Isak whispered. He tilted his head, allowing for easier access as they kissed lazily, the kind of kiss that implied that there would be many others to come.

Celestina Warbeck started crooning in the background. Isak was content to ignore the wailing, but Even drew back with a mischievous smile. He twisted the dial until the music was filling the small space completely. 

“Isn’t this song great?” Even said, moving in step and tugging Isak until he reluctantly joined in, swaying in the small space. He was shit at dancing, but Even’s enthusiasm was infectious. 

They twirled around until Isak got tangled in Even’s long limbs and down they went.

They collapsed on the bed in a giggling heap, still kissing whenever they could catch their breath. 

At the feeling of Even stretched out beneath him, Isak remembered that he had some unfinished business from the night before. He slid down, rucking up Even’s shirt as he licked his way to the waistband of Even’s boxers. He could smell his own soap on Even’s skin mixing with the heady scent he had come to associate with the boy—and a possessive part of him he didn’t know existed reared its head happily.

Even was fully on board with the proceedings, as indicated by the hardness Isak could feel straining beneath his briefs.

Isak breathed on him through the fabric, mouthing at the head and making eye contact with Even, who looked  _ wrecked _ before Isak had even really gotten started. 

He pulled down the elastic, letting Even’s long cock spring free. He gulped, faced with the reality of this decision. 

“Hey,” Even’s voice shook. “You don’t have to if you aren’t ready, we can take it sl—”

He was abruptly cut off when Isak licked a wet stripe up from the base, suckling on the head when he got there. 

Working up the nerve, he took a bit more in, not trying to take the whole thing, but doing what he knew he liked. Even moaned, a deep rumbling that Isak could feel where they were connected.

Isak took in a bit too much and choked a bit, feeling his eyes water, but he waved Even off and kept going. He was intoxicated with the feeling, the power he could get from knowing he was the one to force those sounds out of Even. 

“Stop, stop, want you up here,” Even’s frantic voice cut through the fog in Isak’s head. 

Isak scrambled up to crash into Even’s lips, their hands fumbling over each other as they rushed to pull down Isak’s boxers. 

Even reached for his discarded wand and conjured some lube, taking both of their cocks into his hand. It took some coordination, but soon they were rocking into it. 

The wet slide of Even’s silky cock against his own combined with the lost look on his face were more than enough to bring Isak over the edge, 

He muffled his cry in Even’s mouth, kissing him through it. Even swiped his hand through the wetness on his stomach and, using it as additional lube, stroked himself quickly. It was so hot Isak could have sworn he was going to get hard again that moment. He circled his hand over Even’s, telling him, “come for me, come on, you’re so hot, fuck,” and Even came over their hands, groaning into Isak’s hair. 

They lay there, heaving and sated, as Even worried at the skin on Isak’s neck until he realized the time. 

“Fuck, I can’t bail on Eskild again,” Isak groaned, not wanting to cut short his time with Even.

“Alright, let’s get cleaned up and head down,” Even said simply. Like it was that easy.

Just the thought that he had someone to do these things with him, someone as amazing as Even, sent a wave of gratitude coursing through Isak, and he leaned up to kiss him fervently. Even seemed surprised but quickly got with the program.

They took a while to get out of bed.

  
  


* * *

They wandered down to the Great Hall, with a few stops along the way for pausing in hidden corners, scandalizing the portraits nearby. 

Striding down the center of the Great Hall with newfound confidence, Isak sat down in his customary spot across from Eskild, who grinned delightedly when he saw that Even was joining them. The smile turned wicked when he spotted the hickey on Isak’s neck. Isak avoided his gaze by piling toast onto his plate.

“I see we’ve sorted this out, have we?” he teased. “Your guru is very proud of you.” 

“Eskild.”

“Yes, baby gay?”

“Eat.”

* * *

The next two weeks flew by in a haze of happiness. 

Smiles came to Isak more easily than he could ever remember. Their lives fit together seamlessly, as if they hadn’t ever lived them separately. 

At first, they were the talk of the school. An inter-house relationship was always prime gossip fodder, but adding their year difference and that they’re both boys? They never stood a chance. As it became old news, though, the other students quickly became used to seeing them together, and the whispers started to die down when they were around.

Now that there was nothing in the way, it seemed they couldn’t get enough of each other. They would sneak into empty classrooms to make out, tugging at belt loops and snagging hands. Their textbooks would lay abandoned as they distracted themselves in the stacks. 

[ ](https://imgur.com/PuF0jNe)

It seemed Even had picked up on Isak’s need for touch, so he was constantly giving him affirming, fond squeezes of the neck or waist, ruffles of his hair. Isak couldn’t get enough of the casual affection after so long without. 

Perhaps even better than the onslaught of physical benefits, however, was that Even was  _ present _ . He hung out with Isak and the boys, smiled sunnily at him from across the table while they studied. Isak never had to wonder where he was or where he stood—he wanted to be with Isak, and so he was. Simple as that.

This was the future that Isak had glimpsed that first time they had hung out, and it was even better than he had imagined. 

* * *

“It’s so...bright?” Madhi offered. 

“And there are so many plants?” Jonas added, his voice lilting toward the end like it didn’t know where it was going. 

They were settled on some decidedly comfortable couches facing each other in the warm yellow light of the Hufflepuff common room near the kitchens. It was their first time there—“There’s two Hufflepuffs in the group now—we get some say!” Magnus had argued, elbowing Even significantly and filling Isak with a elated glow that his friends had accepted Even so easily.

“I’m sorry it’s not green or cold enough for you guys,” Magnus indignantly scoffed. “You can’t admit this is nicer than the dungeons? It’s a _ dungeon _ !” 

“Hey man, we’re here aren’t we?” Madhi argued.

Isak was perfectly content with their current location, but then again, now that he was with Even and there was nothing he was hiding—he was pretty content overall. 

They weren’t doing anything, not even touching; he wanted to make sure that they could hang out with his friends without being annoying about it. Even seemed to understand and be enjoying himself either way, joking with the boys comfortably. He was currently demonstrating how he does his animated drawings for Jonas, who was fascinated by the process. 

He finished the drawing, and, tapping the paper with his wand, intoned, “ _ trahere animatis _ ”. 

It immediately came to life, showing Magnus running off the page, away from Vilde. The group shook with laughter.

“Not cool, man.” Magnus said in a hurt tone.

“Hey, I’m rooting for you!” Even said adamantly. “You just have to put yourself out there.” 

“I wish I was a bit more Gryffindor,” Magnus said ruefully. 

“Hey, none of that. They don't have a monopoly on being brave,” Even insisted. 

They heard a tapping at the window; it was a tawny owl clutching a letter. Magnus opened the window, and the owl flew directly to Isak. When Even recognized the owl, however, he grabbed the letter before Isak could open it, lighting it on fire with a quick  _ incendio _ . The owl fluttered off, clearly miffed at this treatment of its precious cargo.

“What’d you do that for?” Isak asked, beyond confused and looking for validation from his friends, who had already returned to their game of Exploding Snap.

“It’s from Sonja,” Even insisted. “You don’t need to listen to anything she tells you.” 

“What’s the big deal?” Isak pushed.

“She’s just trying to get in your head,” he justified. Isak wasn’t quite buying it - he knew there had to be something else to this. 

Their attention was drawn back to the group, where a large bang had preceded a scuffle. 

Isak felt the worries quickly slip away—clearly Even knew best about the situation. 

  
  


* * *

They stayed there, just chatting and drinking, until the sun had escaped and the only light came from the cheery fireplace. Madhi, who was now reclined comfortably, dangled his head backward off of the couch to look out the window. 

“I’m still not sure about the plants,” he said, “but I could get used to all of the windows. Look, you can even see the moon from here. Which one is that, the gibbon? Waving? Fuck, I learned nothing in Divination.”

“So fucking glad we don’t have to take that anymore,” Magnus agreed. “That class was bullshit.”

Isak and Even had gravitated toward each other, Isak’s feet tucked under Even’s thigh, one of Even’s hands curled around the delicate bone and stroking the exposed skin above his sock. Isak was on a cloud that had nothing to do with the Firewhiskey - he had his friends, and he had even. Best of all, he had no secrets.

Jonas, who was idly flipping through Even’s sketchbook, stopped short suddenly. “Whoa, man, these are good!” He tilted the book toward them so they could see. Even immediately stilled.

It was Isak—his hands, his profile. They were different from the cartoons, realistically drawn, but still moving slightly, the tendons flexing. Isak felt something in him warm at the intense observation they must have taken; that anyone would bother to pay that much attention to him was unthinkable.

[](https://imgur.com/BD1jjho)

“You even got his weird nose right,” Jonas teased. “Someone’s got it bad.”

“Yeah,” Even said, finally looking directly at Isak, giving his ankle a squeeze. “I do.”


	7. The Boy with a Secret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A romantic evening—and a revelation.

“Why am I always following you around, huh?”

Isak huffed as he trailed just behind an excitable Even, who was tugging him along by the hand. All the older boy had mentioned was a surprise—and despite his newfound knowledge of all things Even, Isak still had no idea what that could possibly mean, other than romantic. 

They had run into Jonas on their way out of the dungeons, and Even had excused them, saying he was spending some time with his boyfriend. Even using that word to describe him was enough to melt Isak into a compliant puddle, blushing all the way down the halls.

For the past few days Even had been acting more enigmatic than ever, disappearing to the owlery at odd hours. It looked like Isak was finally going to find out why.

He expected them to perhaps turn toward Even’s hideout in the Divination tower. When  _ that  _ didn’t happen, he unconsciously started heading toward Hogsmeade, going by instinct rather than the fading evening light. Instead, they headed off of the path, down toward the Forbidden Forest.

They came to an abrupt halt just before the trees started coming in thick. Isak looked at Even, confusion clear on his face. 

Even quirked his eyebrows, tilting his head. “Here we are!” he proclaimed. 

“The forest? That’s it?” 

“No,  _ here _ ,” Even insisted.

Even took his hand, bringing it forward through the chilled empty air until he hit… something. 

“What the hell is that?” Isak said, tracing around the edges of what felt like canvas. 

“Come on!” Even said, making a motion like he was pulling something back, and then leading Isak incongruously into a cozy studio apartment lit by fairy lights and candles.

Rather, it was a magic tent—Isak could see the canvas sides comprising the walls and smell the slightly musty scent of disuse that all sporting equipment seemed to have. It really was exactly like they were inside, including the warmth of a roaring fireplace in the corner. The only thing that gave it away was the slight ripple in the walls as the wind buffeted around them. 

“I sent for it from home,” Even explained.

“And no one can see it?” Isak said, spinning to face Even. 

“Nei. I warded it. It’s just you and me tonight,” he confirmed, pulling Isak in for a breathtaking kiss. This felt different than their others—they knew each other now, knew how to fit together. This kiss was the start of something else, rather than an experience on its own.

Up until this point, they hadn’t gone further than mouths and hands—not that he would ever get enough of either of those. He didn’t know if Even was waiting for him, or if  _ he _ was nervous, but he knew he wanted everything Even was willing to give him. 

He broke away for a second to map their route to the plush bed, then guided Even along until his own knees were backed up against the springy mattress. He let himself fall back, pulling Even on top of him. 

He would never be over the feeling of touching Even, all of his nerves pressed up against that lean body. Even responded enthusiastically, one arm bracing himself as he delved into Isak’s mouth and writhed against him.

Of a mind, they clumsily pulled off hoodies and shirts and pants, seemingly endless layers and chuckles when they got stuck, until they were finally naked together for the first time.

Isak spent a long moment taking in the miles of creamy pale skin and lithe muscles on display before meeting those blue eyes. Even looked…  _ hungry _ . 

“ _ Fuck _ , Isak,” he said, running his hand along the definition of Isak’s abs and reaching into the darker curls at the base of his cock, squeezing him in a way that he knew Isak liked. Isak arched up, hissing at the contact.

He could have come on the spot at his next words.

“Will you fuck me?” Even asked, as if there was anything Isak would be willing to deny him, especially in that moment. 

In response, Isak moaned loudly, thankful for their distance from the castle as he leaned up to catch Even’s mouth again in an enthusiastic show of agreement. 

“Can I get you ready?” he said, already reaching for his wand to perform the necessary spells. 

Even’s reply was breathless. “Will  _ you _ do it? Get me ready for your cock?” He punctuated this with a filthy grind of his hips against Isak’s.

Isak moaned again at the image this painted, but complied, only performing the incantations for lube and protection (yes, Eskild forced him to memorize those spells—like  _ that _ wasn’t an awkward conversation) before he flipped them over, settling between Even’s long legs. 

Isak had done this before to himself out of curiosity, but he had no real idea how to do it for someone else. To distract both himself and Even he took Even’s cock into his mouth as his fingers found and started to circle that tight hole. 

Isak sucked, bobbing his head up and down along the now-familiar contours of Even’s cock, and massaged his hole until it relaxed enough for one of Isak’s fingers to slip into that vice-like heat. Even let out a deep moan, pressing down against Isak’s fingers like he needed more.

He fucked in with that one finger, timing it with the movements of his bobbing head until Even was open enough for him to add another. Above him, Even was a mess, gasping and clutching the sheets. 

“Fuck it, do the spell,” Even urged. “Want you in me now.” 

“Okay, okay,” Isak replied, wiping off his hand and mouth and reaching for his wand—no way was he going to trust  _ this _ to a wandless. He performed the spell, Even immediately groaning at the stretch. 

“Want you, baby, cmon,” Even pleaded, deep voice rough. 

“How do you want me?” Isak asked, running a calming hand along Even’s side. 

“Just like this, want to see you.” 

Isak conjured a bit more lube (wishing Eskild the teacher wasn’t featuring in his head) that he smeared on his cock. He propped Even’s leg on his shoulder as he got into position, lining himself up with Even’s clenching hole. 

Isak looked at Even, at his wide eyes and flushed cheeks, and made the first push in, drawing moans out of both of them. Isak leaned to touch his forehead to Even’s as he slowly pushed in, taking breaks so that Even could acclimate to the feeling. 

He was finally to the hilt in Even, the tight heat overwhelming him. Once Even nodded, Isak leaned back, giving his first real thrust into Even. 

He rocked back and forth, slowly increasing his range until he was all out fucking into Even, swiftly getting into the rhythm of it.

Drawing his hips back only to drive them back in, harder and faster until they were both moaning wrecks, grasping at the sheets, at each other, at whatever. 

Even moved his leg down, flipping them over so that he was straddling Isak. He raised himself and, steadying Isak’s cock, lowered himself onto it, taking the full length in one go. 

By now Even’s hole was accepting Isak’s cock with ease, and it wasn’t long before Even was riding Isak hard. 

Even, chest heaving and moans unfiltered, made for a vision that Isak could never have imagined. He shone with sweat, lean muscles flexing as he lifted himself over and over.

“Gonna come soon,” he warned Even, who only picked up the pace. Isak circled his hand around Even’s leaking cock, jerking it in time with Even’s movements. 

With a final “ _ Isak! _ ”, Even came onto Isak’s stomach, hips stuttering as his hole contracted around Isak. 

Even held himself up, panting in Isak’s ear as Isak took one, two, thrusts into that willing body and came hard, crying out Even’s name.

It took awhile for them to come down, and even longer than that for them to separate. Even was all limbs on top of Isak, pressing them together as much as possible—Isak had no complaints about that. They kissed slowly, savouring the connection they had just shared. 

Even was up first, however, having a seemingly boundless amount of energy. He started digging around in the kitchenette area, pulling out all sorts of random food. 

“I knew you had an in with the house elves,” Isak teased from the bed.

“What can I say? They love me,” Even laughed. “They keep saying they want to feed me.” 

“They probably just want to get some meat on your bones,” Isak joked. 

“That hurts baby,” Even pouted. “I thought you liked my meat.” 

“Ugh…” Isak just buried his face in the pillow. 

They got up eventually to migrate over to the fireplace, both of them wrapped in sheets, and devour the food that Even had acquired. Isak was soaring—he couldn’t believe this was his life. Even was a vision wrapped in a sheet, pale skin on display, all his adoring attention on Isak. 

“We should get married in a tent,” Even said around his mouthful. 

Isak choked for a second. “We’re getting married?”

“Yeah, don’t you think so?” Even said, all smiles.

Isak felt his eyebrows lifting in surprise. With Even in this mood, though, he was loath to disagree. Anything to keep him smiling and happy. He mainly concentrated on his food, letting Even ramble at a mile a minute and smiling indulgently. 

They got back into the comfortable bed, Isak letting Even do most of the chatting as they lounged together, kissing and playing. They lay there, curled toward each other in a circle, accompanied only by the crackle of the fire and the natural cacophony of the forest.

Isak felt himself blush when Even brushed one of his curls away from his face—ridiculous, considering what they had just gotten up to, but that kind of intimacy was still novel for Isak, who had gone so long without. 

[](https://imgur.com/efRL21F)

Isak couldn’t help himself—now that he was so happy, he wasn’t having any trouble sleeping. He could feel himself dozing off even as Even was still going a mile a minute. 

He would wake up intermittently to banging sounds—Even in the kitchen, Even in the bathroom. 

“Come to bed, baby,” he whined, the endearment slipping out easily. 

“I can’t,” Even said, bounding over to him. “You look way too hot laying there. This  _ night _ , don’t you feel it?”

The pattern repeated, until one time Isak woke to silence and an empty bed. Worried, he looked in vain around the tent for Even. The only sign of him was his clothing. His clothing—it registered belatedly in his sleep-addled mind—and his wand.

Isak jumped up, pulling on his pants and hoodie quickly and calling out for him. “Even! Even come on.” 

He grabbed his own wand and entered the frosty air outside the tent, casting a bobbing light to hover above it so he could find his way back afterward. He skirted the edge of the forest, tripping over roots and calling for Even with increasing desperation but not seeing any signs of him. The sounds of the forest, so loud before, quieted ominously as he moved along.

He was just about to lose hope when he got to the lake, where, on a rock jutting out over the water was Even, naked and crouched in an uncharacteristic, animal-like pose. 

“Even, come on, what are you doing? Let’s go back inside, it’s freezing.” 

Even didn’t seem like he registered the words, he was so preoccupied with staring off into the clear sky. At the moon?

“Even...” Isak started to say, when all of a sudden the boy turned to him with a horrified look distorting his features. 

“Isak, go to the castle, I —”

But he let out a blood curdling scream as his body started contorting. 

Isak knew from his studies what he was seeing, but that didn’t make it easier to digest.

Even gave one last look toward Isak, and his face was no longer recognizable—he had completely transformed, long limbs stretched longer, snout extended, and golden hair all over.

Then Even, the werewolf, loped into the darkness of the forest.

Isak stood there for a moment, reality reassembling in his mind even as he cast a few protection charms out of habit. A howl— _ Even’s _ howl—shook him into awareness. What if Even got hurt in the forest at night? Yes, he was in the form of a predator, but there were other things in the forest that could hurt him. 

He shivered, out of cold and concern. He didn’t know how many people knew about Even’s.. problem, and he didn’t want to out him unnecessarily. He knew how the wizarding population felt about that kind of affliction. Hell, he had witnessed it first hand with his mom. 

There was one person he knew of who he could talk to—no matter how little he wanted to communicate with her. 

He rushed back to the tent, hoping the disillusionment charm applied to Even in werewolf form, and sank to his knees at the fireplace. 

Tossing in a pinch of the Floo powder he found on the hearth, he called  _ Sonja Olsen _ into the flames. 

He stuck his head through to a standard Norwegian living room, yelling out until a harassed looking Sonja came around the corner in her sleeping clothes. 

When she saw who it was, though, her face immediately morphed into one of concern. 

“Isak, what is it, what’s happened to Even?”

He could barely get his words together. 

“It’s a full moon...he t-transformed into a werewolf and ran into the forest.” 

“ _ Fuck _ ,” she swore. “This is what I was trying to tell you! I knew he was getting too excited, forgetting his potions. Why couldn’t you just leave him alone?”

“I didn’t know, he didn’t say anything…”

“No shit, that’s why I was trying to tell you. Where is he now?”

“He went into the forest right after he transformed.”

A pause.

“You saw it?” she said in a small voice. 

“Yeah. The whole thing,” he admitted. “Will he be okay? Who knows? Is there anything I need to do?

“No, you’ve done enough,” Sonja said sternly. “He’ll be fine in the forest. I’ll be there in the morning to help him.”

“But…” he fought for words, not knowing what he wanted but needing to assert his place at Even’s side. 

“No, Isak. Just stay away from him!”

With that she ended the connection. 

Isak was promptly expelled from the fire. He landed on his back, sprawled and with the wind knocked out of him.

He lay there for a moment, giving himself a second to wallow. 

Finally, he rose on shaky legs. He got his things together and cleared up the tent as much as possible, erasing the remnants of their romantic evening and leaving Even’s clothes folded on the bed for when he got back.

When he got back.

Isak couldn’t imagine what state he would be in after that painful transformation, a night of hell in the forest, and then to come back and Isak being gone. He wanted to stay, but he also didn’t want to make things worse. 

The echo of a lonely howl followed him up the path to the castle.


	8. The Boy with a Shield

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak looks for comfort and finds answers.

Isak barricaded himself in his room for the rest of the weekend. Not against Even, necessarily, but against the world. Reality had once again come crashing down on him, and this time he didn’t have the strength to crawl out from the rubble. As soon as he had something good in his life it was taken away. It was naive of him to think that he was going to get to be happy.

He knew Even was okay because Sonja had sent him a terse note, which was more than he deserved, if this really was his fault. 

Why didn’t Even just tell him? What had he done to make him think that Isak wouldn’t accept him? 

Isak thought back to when he told Even about his mom. How right after, Even tried to ditch him. 

Even had to know that this was an entirely different situation, right? He could see now that maybe it made him think that Isak would reject him, maybe even out him. 

If that was the case though, Even should have said something when he decided to be with Isak. There were plenty of opportunities in those few weeks to tell him, to warn him. 

Everything swirled in Isak’s head—good memories, bad memories. He needed to get everything straight.

These are the things Isak knew: 

  1. Even was a werewolf
  2. Even didn’t tell him he was a werewolf
  3. He distracted Even from taking his potions



Sonja’s accusing words echoed that last point in his head. He needed to stay away from Even. Hadn’t Even proved her right when he forgot his potions, of all weeks, that of the full moon?

Isak had to do this, not for his own sake, but for Even’s. Who knew who would see him the next time he forgot and transformed, or, Merlin forbid, who would get hurt. Even didn’t need that kind of guilt weighing on him. 

His door shook intermittently with knocks from his friends, and more than once from Even himself. Isak heard them calling through to him, asking him what was wrong, and in Even’s case, pleading for Isak to let him explain. But Isak wasn’t ready, and he told them all this in a detached voice, eventually setting a ward on the door to prevent further temptation.

Isak lay on his bed, filtering through memories in his head. 

Watching Even transform, the utter fear that had seized him all night, worries that he would be okay, that he wouldn’t encounter anything more deadly than himself, that no one would see him. 

The feelings—the worry, the guilt, the fear—paralyzed him.

He desperately needed to talk to someone, but he knew full well it wasn’t his secret to share. He felt sure that it would burst out of him if he saw his friends, if Jonas directed that doleful green gaze his way. No, he couldn’t talk with them yet.

So he stayed holed up. Wallowing, if he was being honest with himself.

He needed to get out of the castle. 

* * * 

He got permission from Slughorn after his classes ended for the day to visit his mother, (the professors all knew about her situation,  _ his _ situation, and why he stays on campus) and before he could really think it through he was stepping into the Floo in Slughorn’s office through to the guest entrance of St. Mungo’s. When he hit the polished marble, however, he knew he had made the right choice. 

With practiced ease he made his way up to the  [ _ "Dangerous" Dai Llewellyn Ward for Serious Bites _ ](https://harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/%22Dangerous%22_Dai_Llewellyn_Ward_for_Serious_Bites) . He headed straight to the Vampirism section, nodding amiably at the nurse who smiled cheerfully at him in recognition. 

He slid quietly into the room labelled  _ Valterson _ , grinning for the first time in days when he saw his mother was awake. She looked better than last time, more lucid. Her long blond hair looked clean in its loose curls, and her thin face was clear of the struggle she normally was fighting. A good day, then. 

“Halla, mamma.” 

“Isak!” Her face lit up at the sight of him, and she beckoned for him to come closer. Some days this wasn’t allowed, but on good days, he was able to hug her as much as he wanted. 

She must have noticed his grip around her was a bit tighter than normal. 

“You okay,  _ skatten min _ ?”

“I’m alright.” He pulled away reluctantly. 

“How’s school? Learning a lot?”

“It’s fine, mamma. My marks are good.” 

“I’m so proud of you, Isak.”

He sat next to her on her bed, chatting and hearing all of the gossip going around the ward. He scowled furiously when he heard that his father hadn’t come to visit. 

“It’s fine. It’s not his fault.” As always, she rushed to defend him. “It’d be a hard situation for anyone. I don’t blame him.” 

Isak paused. “So you think it’s not possible? For people to be together when one of them is..sick?”

His mamma paused. “I do think it’s possible, but maybe not for someone like your dad. He just loves in his own way.”

She continued at Isak’s prolonged silence, probing gently. “Did something happen?” 

Isak took a deep breath. “Mamma… I met someone.” 

“Oh  _ elskling _ . Do you love him?”

“Yes,” he answered immediately, without thinking. Then he realized. 

His head swivelled up so fast he got dizzy. “How do you know it’s a him?”

She smiled indulgently. “You have to give me a bit more credit. I know I’ve been preoccupied, but I know my son.”

He blushed, suddenly entranced with the pattern on her blanket.

“So what’s his name?” she prompted.

“Even,” he said, finally meeting her eyes. “It’s over now though.” He fought the burn of tears forming.

“Why’s that?” she asked, eyebrows furrowing in a mirror of his own.

“He’s...sick. Like you’re sick.” Recognition dawned on her face. “And he didn’t tell me.” 

“Did you think maybe he was scared to tell you?” she asked gently. “I’m sure lots of people have been unfair to him about it.” 

“I guess,” he said much more dismissively than he felt. “It’s fine though. Like you said, not everyone can be with someone like that. What if I’m just like pappa?” 

There it was—the real fear.

“You are  _ not _ like your pappa,” she said sternly. “Your pappa is a good man, but he does not love like you do. Who is here right now? Who takes care of me?”

Isak could only stare at his wringing hands with undue interest.

“If you love him, you can love this part of him. I know you can.”

He swiftly steered their conversation towards less heart wrenching topics.

They stayed, chatting and laughing, enjoying each other’s company. As the evening progressed, her face became more strained, the laughs coming less easily. 

Finally, with a hinting nod from the attending Healer, it came time for Isak to head back to Hogwarts. 

As he was turning to leave, she snagged his hand. 

“Isak? Thank you for telling me. Write to me and tell me how it goes, okay?”

“ _ Takk _ , mamma.  _ Jeg elsker deg _ _. _ ” 

“ _ Jeg elsker deg også, sønnen min _ .”

* * * 

He turned the corner out of Slughorn’s office and ran smack into Professor Potter. He’d always liked the ex-auror—the perpetually rumpled professor gave engaging lessons and told the best stories. He’s the one who helped Isak achieve his Patronus, despite the odds.

“Oi, what’s your hurry there Valterson! Ah, I see,” he said, eyeing Slughorn’s door with a familiar weariness. 

Isak suppressed a grin. “I was visiting my mother at St. Mungo’s.”

Professor Potter’s green eyes got warmer. 

“How’s she doing then?”

“She seemed to be doing well today, especially at first.”

“Well I’m sure she appreciated you visiting. Not every student would take time from their friends and studies.” 

The professor turned to go. Isak didn’t know what prompted him to ask, “Sir? Is it true you’ve known a werewolf?”

At this, Professor Potter straightened, running a hand through his messy black hair. “I’ve had the honor of knowing more than one. Why do you ask?” he said warily. 

“I just..found out that someone I know is, too.” Isak was careful to not be too specific. 

At this, the professor’s gaze softened. “Ah yes. The full moon was last week, was it not? I imagine you have questions.” 

Isak nodded dumbly. “I just want to know more about him— _ them _ .” 

“The most important thing to know is that they are still witches and wizards, just like you and me. It’s complete rubbish the way society treats them,” he said fervently. Signature ire was taking over his professor’s face. 

He continued, voice struggling for neutrality, “They just have to take a potion every day, and around the full moon they will have more energy. But that’s really it. The Wolfsbane Potion has come a long way."

That stopped Isak short. “Really?

“I imagine it’s been hard on you, coping with your mother’s situation, but it’s not like that. We don’t know much about vampires, and all we can do is ease their cravings. But with lycanthropy, a potion is all it takes to have it under control and live a normal life.” 

If that was true, then there was no reason they couldn’t be together. If only Even will let Isak explain.

The relief must have been visible on his face. 

“Don’t just take my word for it though. You know what Hermione—cough—Minister Granger always says, 'When in doubt, go to the library!' The professor took him by the shoulders and steered him toward that direction.

“Thanks, Professor. I appreciate it.” 

“A word of advice?” Professor Potter said. “Maybe give Even a break about not telling you sooner. I’m sure you know how awfully people can react to that type of news.” 

“Wh-what?” Isak stuttered. 

“I know the signs. Don’t worry, his secret is safe with me.” 

With a knowing gleam and reassuring squeeze of Isak’s shoulder, the professor bid him farewell. 

* * * 

Isak got back to his dorm feeling much lighter than when he had left it. He greeted his friends warmly to their visible relief, but he excused himself to his room quickly so that they wouldn’t see the theme of the books he carried. He dropped the stack on his desk.

There was a letter sitting on his bed. His heart seized when he recognized the looped handwriting.  _ Even _ . 

He ripped open the envelope, hoping to find out where Even was so he could talk to him and get some clarity. His heart started racing as he read the lines.

_ Isak,  _

_ I’m so sorry that I hid this from you. I understand why you don’t want to see me anymore. I’m going back to Norway, so you won’t have to. I can’t hurt you from there.  _

_ Maybe this was the way that it was supposed to happen. Maybe it’s all I am. _

_ I’m going to go to where we first met, then I’m headed to Hogsmeade to catch my Portkey back to Oslo. _

_ Love you.  _

_ -Even _

The parchment fluttered to the floor as Isak bolted from the room, crashing through the grouping of his friends in the common room and making the portraits chastise him as he sprinted down the hallways toward the courtyard outside of the Great Hall, where he had met all Even those months ago after that first HUG meeting. 

Isak slowed his steps as he approached the courtyard, breath billowing in front of him and eyes flitting rapidly as he searched for Even. Finally they alighted upon that familiar frame, sitting across the courtyard on the same low slung wall they first chatted on. His shoulders were slumped with the weight of 

He looked drawn and tired, and, above all, mournful, though hope tinted his face when he looked up and met Isak’s gaze. 

Even slid off of the wall, taking slow steps until he and Isak met under the leafless canopy in the center of the courtyard. Snow was falling around them, hovering on their eyelashes, glistening in their hair, but Isak hardly felt the chill.

Even was uncharacteristically silent, watching Isak warily like he thought he was going to bolt at any moment. He appeared to be taking him in like this would be the last time.

These are the things Isak knew: 

  1. He loves Even.
  2. Even should never look like that if Isak could help it. 



And suddenly it was that simple.

Emboldened, Isak stepped closer, cradling Even’s face in his hands. He traced his thumb along those sharp cheekbones, pink from the cold. He felt the warmth of his skin—the realness of him. Isak brought their foreheads together, body sparking as this simple connection arced between them, glowing in its affirmation. 

The world zeroed in to just them in that moment, only the points where they were connected.

Slowly, he nuzzled each of Even’s cold cheeks in turn, felt his eyelashes flutter shut. They brushed against his skin in a kiss, his breath ghosted over his face in a caress. 

“I know who  _ you _ are,” Isak finally whispered. 

[](https://imgur.com/ZeiAbag)

Finally, after he could take it no longer, he fitted his lips over Even’s in a binding kiss that brooked no argument. 

He tried to press all of his love, his acceptance, into the touches. He wanted Even to feel it, to know it in his bones how sorry he was for ever doubting that.

He wanted Even to know he meant this, that it wasn’t something he was taking lightly.

He kept it chaste—this wasn’t about anything other than proving to Even that Isak accepted him, all of him. 

As they stood there, snow falling around them, Isak held Even and knew that this time, he wouldn’t be letting go.


	9. The Boy with It All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isak gets his happy beginning.

The green light reflected off of the panes of Even’s pale skin, filling the hollows carved from sleeplessness. His almost invisible eyelashes fanned against his cheeks, shifting imperceptibly as he dreamed. 

The evening before, he was as docile as a lamb, taking little prodding to tug his lanky form back to Isak’s room and arrange them in the bed, limbs falling into place like a well worn puzzle. 

All throughout, Even kept trying to halfheartedly talk about  _ it _ , but Isak decided that the first order of business was getting rid of the dark circles under Even’s eyes. They could sort everything else out afterward.

Soon after they got settled, Jonas brought by some food from dinner and a letter. He gave an understanding nod at the Even-shaped lump under the covers and made a swift retreat, for which Isak was incredibly grateful. 

He opened the envelope, skimming the parchment. 

_ Isak, _

_ I’m sorry I reacted the way I did. It’s not your fault that he forgot his potions. None of this is your fault, and I shouldn’t have said that it was. Just be patient with him and take it one day at a time. Maybe you’ll have better luck than I did.  _

_ -Sonja _

He creased the paper, feeling a weight on dissipate. It wasn’t that he needed the affirmation, but the guilt remained whether or not he knew her previous words to be true. He stuck the note in his trunk, knowing he may need those words at some point in the future. 

He tore through his dinner, suddenly remembering he hadn’t had a proper meal in ages, then settled back into his vigil by Even’s side. 

* * * 

Finally Even started to rouse. Isak felt better at just the first sight of those blue eyes, even if they were still wary and assessing. 

“Hei.” Even’s voice came out croaky from sleep and disuse. 

“Hei.” 

“What time is it?” Even asked groggily, but it didn’t seem like that was what he meant to ask.

Isak performed a time telling spell. ”8:30.”

“I should still go to Norway,” Even insisted suddenly, apparently rallying his strength to be stubborn. “I’m just going to hurt you if I stay here.” 

Isak was prepared for it this time though. He had been rehearsing his stance while Even slept. 

“You don’t know how things are going to turn out, Trelawney. All you have to do is take your potions and we won’t have to worry about it at all. Just tell me what happened this time.” 

Even rolled onto his back, addressing the ceiling as if Isak’s earnest countenance was too much to bear. 

“I was trying to pretend that I could be normal, that I could have you. I didn’t even realize that it was coming up so soon, I’m so sorry Isak.” He finally cut his wide eyes over.

“What are you apologizing for?” Isak wanted to clarify.

“For  _ this _ .” He gestured to a nasty scar on his leg that Isak hadn’t had the courage to ask about. “For being like this.” 

“You think that I’m mad you’re a werewolf?” Isak said.

He nodded, a shaky thing that spoke of experience and broke Isak’s heart.

“I wasn’t mad about that. I was upset because you didn’t tell me. How could I be mad about something you can’t control?” Isak insisted.

“My—so called—friends at Durmstrang didn’t take the news very well,” he said, confirming Isak’s suspicions. “That’s why I had to leave. One of them told the whole school, and you can guess how everyone reacted.”

Isak could only imagine how horrible that scene would be. He had seen enough of that kind of narrow minded speciesism with how his old neighbors—hell, even his dad—reacted to his mother’s changing. A whole school? The parents would be in an uproar. 

“Is that why you tried to break up with me when I told you about my mom?”

Even nodded.

“What I said then, I didn’t mean it,” Isak said. “We were so new, and I didn’t want to scare you off. So I tried to make light of it. But that’s not how I feel about it. I love my mamma, and her vampirism doesn’t change that.” 

When Even’s expression didn’t change, he added, “I saw her yesterday, actually. I told her about you.” 

The severity on Even’s face gave way to surprise. “Really?” 

“Of course. You’re important to me, so I want her to know about you.”

“But what if…. “ Even tried to interject.

“No what if’s,” Isak said firmly. “Just facts. Do you love me?”

He knew it was in the letter, but he had to hear it for himself.

Even’s cheeks pinked but his eyes narrowed in their fervency. “Yes.” 

“Then we are going to give this a try, because I love you, too. Can I help remind you about your potions?

Conflict warred on Even’s face, but resignation reigned. “Yes. that’s the least I owe you.  “Then everything is going to be okay. Chill?”

Finally, Even smiled, a poor shadow of his normal smile, but a smile nonetheless. “Chill.”

Isak couldn’t stop himself anymore. He felt like he had been going through withdrawal from Even’s affection. He leaned in, taking Even’s jaw in his hand as he pressed their lips together carefully.

  
  


* * * 

Even spent the rest of the next two days sleeping in Isak’s bed, catching up on what had indeed been days of missed sleep and recovering from his transformation and night of violence in the forest, followed by worries that Isak was going to out him. He’d been through a lot, but they were through to the other side.

Finally on Wednesday Isak returned from dinner to find Even up, looking freshly showered and flipping through a book from his spot at the end of the bed. 

The signature crinkled brightness was back in Even’s eyes as he greeted him with a deep ‘Halla’. It lilted in its happiness. 

“Halla,” Isak said, stooping to kiss him soundly. His heart leapt at finally seeing him awake and lucid.

Isak propped himself at the end of the bed as well and saw what Even was reading. It was one of the werewolf lore books he had discretely checked out from the library, which Isak had pored over while Even slept. 

“I see you were doing your research,” Even said, but his voice had resumed its jocular tone. 

“Hey, I had to know what I was getting myself into,” Isak bantered easily. “Too bad we already covered you in third year, I’m an expert now.” 

“Oh yeah? You think so?” Even’s eyes crinkled impossibly further. “What about you? Any veela blood I need to know about?”

“Me?” Isak scoffed. “Veela?” 

“With those blond curls, you could totally be veela.” Even said, tugging at one of them.

Isak blushed an impossible pink, jostling Even in his embarrassment. 

They leaned back on the bed, connected from shoulder to hip and just enjoying looking at each other. 

“What’s this?” Even asked, pulling out the bright parchment sticking out of Isak’s pants pocket. 

“Ach. Vilde caught me after Potions. It’s the HUGS Christmas party this weekend. She got permission to use the Room of Requirement. Hey, you wanna be my date?” he said, waggling his eyebrows. 

“I don’t know…” Even teased. 

“Oh I see how it is. Either way, I guess we should go. We’re a walking HUGS advertisement,” he joked.

“Well, I just went to talk to you,” Even confessed. “You’re always surrounded by your friends, I didn’t know how else to get to you.” 

Isak was shocked. “You saw me before the HUGS meeting?” 

“I saw you the first day of term, when you came into the Great Hall during the Welcoming Feast.”

“Whoa.” Isak didn’t know what to say.

Even must have liked whatever he saw on Isak’s face because he leaned in, giving Isak plenty of time to pull back if he wanted to. Which, of course, he didn’t. He couldn’t ever not want to kiss Even.

What started off as innocent quickly got heated—they were teenage boys, after all. 

Isak was just so relieved that they had made it through, that there were finally no secrets between them. He wanted to assure himself that Even was truly alright, that they were together and secure.

Even stopped Isak’s hands as they went to tug his shirt (Isak’s shirt, something primal in Isak noted with pride).

“You saw… everything though,” Even said grimly. A hint of the sad and nervous Even had returned, which was unacceptable.

“Yeah? So?” Isak said, not understanding the connection. 

“How can you want me after seeing me like that?” Even insisted. “I’m a monster.” 

“Hey. none of that,” Isak said sternly. “You’re not a monster. You just get furry sometimes.” 

“Still.” 

“Even, trust me. You’re sexy as fuck, either way.”

When Even still hesitated, Isak persisted, “Let me prove it to you.” 

He leaned back into the pillows, pulling Even on top of him.

He tugged off Even’s shirt, kissing over his shoulders at the exposed skin. 

Even tentatively settles his hand on Isak’s abs under his shirt, squeezing his side habitually. Isak encouraged him, arching his back until Even got the idea and slowly pulled free the buttons on his school shirt, one by one, watching him with a reverence that was almost too much to bear.

Isak pulled him back down once he had shrugged it off for the comforting skin on skin contact, the warmth spreading through him as he caught Even’s lips. He ran his hands everywhere, mussing Even’s hair, feeling the flex in his biceps, sliding them over his arse. 

He could feel Even harden against his hip, and he thrust against him eagerly, taking the next opportunity to unbutton and drag down his own trousers and pants. Even’s joggers were easy to make disappear. 

Then it was just them, clinging to each other with no space in between, revelling in each others’ proximity. 

When Isak reached for his wand, Even again froze. 

“Hey,” Isak murmured, soothing a hand down his side. “it’s just us.”

He reached for Even’s hand and spelled some lube onto his palm. 

“I trust you,” he said seriously. 

He guided Even’s hand, down, down, propping himself so that Even could reach him with ease. When hesitant fingers traced over his rim, Isak pressed into it. 

Even gained confidence, moving from rubbing along his rim to sliding one finger in, then two. 

He started really opening him up, stroking along his inner walls and making Isak quiver with the feeling, so alien and yet so intimate. 

“I’m fine,” he insisted when Even had three fingers thrusting into him with ease. 

“Not yet.” 

Even’s voice was a rasp, his brows furrowed as he concentrated on propping himself over Isak, angling his fingers until he reached a spot inside of Isak that made him arch up in surprise, 

“Fuck, Even, please.” 

Even pumped his fingers in a few more times before he deemed Isak ready. He drew back and Isak took the space to turn onto shaky knees. He only felt a moment of embarrassment at the picture he must make before he was lost in anticipation.

_ “Isak,” _ he heard Even swear. “Are you sure?”

“Ja, Even,” Isak whined. “Come on, you know I trust you. Fuck me.” 

After a moment, when Isak was about to turn around and beg, he felt Even grasp his hips with trembling, but sure, fingers. 

Another murmured incantation, and Isak heard the slick sounds of Even putting lube on his cock, then spreading the rest into Isak’s prepared hole. 

Finally,  _ finally _ , Isak felt the head of Even’s long cock pressing at his entrance. 

Even settled himself over Isak’s back, grounding Isak as he slowly fed in his cock.

The stretch was unlike anything Isak had yet experienced, so different from fingers. It was insistent, and it took longer than he would have liked to feel comfortable once the full length was seated inside of him.

Even kissed at Isak’s neck and shoulder as he waited for Isak to give the go ahead.

When Isak felt ready, he signaled his enthusiasm by fucking himself onto the length speared into him, rocking back and forth until the stretch on his rim went from obscene to pleasurable. 

When he was in a rhythm and moaning beneath Even, the older boy seemed to lose his ability to wait passively. He leaned back and gripped Isak’s hip, pulling him back onto his cock 

He angled himself until he found that spot that made Isak convulse earlier. He thrust there over and over until Isak finally fell onto the pillow of his arms as he was taken. 

The act of submission only seemed to spur Even on, his thrusts increasing in strength and vigor.

The new angle let Isak’s neglected cock rub teasingly against the sheets, but it wasn’t enough. When he whined in frustration, Even leaned forward, regaining his previous position draped over Isak’s back and circling those nimble fingers around Isak’s cock, tugging in sure strokes in time with his grinding into his hole. 

The feelings combined to send Isak over the edge, crying out as he shot white over the sheets. 

Even renewed his thrusts, chasing his pleasure now that Isak was a sated, whimpering mess underneath him. 

With one last grind, he came, flooding Isak with his come. Isak was surprised at how he could feel the pulsing of Even’s cock, the warmth of the come as it started to leak out of him with Even’s slowing thrusts. 

Even finally pulled out and away, making Isak reach back with grabby hands until he felt Even’s gentle tongue licking over his sore rim, cleaning him up. Isak was so out of it he couldn’t do anything other than lose himself in the pleasure of those wet strokes teasing him. 

Finally he whined in oversensitivity. Even cast a quick Scourgify to clean the puddle under Isak and lay down, covering Isak’s back and nuzzling into the juncture of his neck as they both started to drift off.

“That chill?” Even got up the energy to say. 

“That’s more than chill,” Isak confirmed, and Even’s huff of laughter is all he felt before he fell asleep.

* * * 

Isak and his friends had taken up a corner of the Room of Requirement where they could watch the goings on from the perfect vantage point (and, of course, access the food and drinks easily). Everyone was dressed up in their Christmas finery (or in Magnus’ and Jonas’ case, jumpers). Drinks and food were heaped on banquet tables on the side of the room, and Mahdi’s ever-present flask had made an appearance.

The Room of Requirement was less of a secret after the events of the war, but it was sealed off by Professor McGonagall for refurbishment. 

The room was dimly lit by fairy lights—no, actual fairies, Isak saw when he looked more closely at the garlands hanging around the room. He could hear their faint chirping under the music. Not one surface was left unadorned with tinsel and ribbon, and the air was suffused with pine and cinnamon. 

A dance floor was already crowded in one corner of the room. It already sported a group of earnest, if not talented, dancers. 

He pushed down the sadness he felt that this would be the closest he got to a real Christmas this year. He may as well enjoy it while it lasts. 

Intermittent booms of Christmas crackers fizzed through the air. Isak already had a crown settled in his curls.

With his friends around him, and Even coming toward him in a beeline, like he had eyes for no one else, he felt like a king. He had it all.

* * *

Even slid into the conversation seamlessly, building Magnus’ confidence to go talk to Vilde. The boys eventually moved off to hit on Vilde or spy on the process, respectively. 

This left them alone in the relatively private corner. They looked over at the sudden whoops and cheers only to see Magnus being kissed thoroughly by Vilde, who obviously got tired of waiting for him to make a move.

Only when they were left alone did he scootch into Isak’s personal space, stroking a hand down his side. 

Isak, feeling daring in face of the crowd around them, caught it, tugging him in closer for a rather filthy kiss. He only stopped when there were a couple of wolf whistles. He drew away out of decency rather than any embarrassment. He could feel himself smiling, wide and easy, as his hand lingered on the nape of Even’s neck and toyed with his hair. 

[ ](https://imgur.com/7CO4OjZ)

He felt himself melt as he stared into Even’s eyes, the fairy lights only adding to the twinkle.

“You know Christmas hols are coming up next week,” Even said out of nowhere. 

“Yeah,” Isak said, mood dimming at the thought of two weeks without Even or his friends, other than Eskild. 

Even said, “My mamma has been bugging me about meeting you. Want to come with me? You can go see your mom whenever you want from there, I’m sure we can arrange a Portkey.” 

Isak smiled so hard he knew he must look ridiculous. 

Even didn’t seem to think so, because he leaned in, kissing it right off Isak’s face and transferring it to his own. 

“So is that a yes?”

“Ja, ja.” Isak nodded fervently.

“It’s not too weird?” Even asked. 

“Nei. As long as you smile and stay on two legs it’s all fine.” 

Even’s smile was blinding. 

  
  


* * *

Eskild stole Even to use him for this height, leaving Isak with Jonas. They leaned back against the wall, watching the merry making from a safe distance.

“Everything good now?” Jonas looked at him sideways. 

“It is.” Isak confirmed. “I’m sorry I can’t tell you what it was about, but thanks for being there.”

“Anytime man. I’m glad you two were able to figure things out. You seem happier with him.” 

“I really am,” he said, making eye contact with Even chatting with Eskild over by the drinks table and feeling a smile inch onto his face reflexively. 

“I mean,” he clarified, “It’s not just being with him. I’m living my real life now, no lies.” 

“Cheers to that,” Jonas said, tilting his spiked Butterbeer. Their bottles made a satisfying clink that sounded like the start of something, rather than the end. 

“Cheers.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow y’all. I hope you enjoyed the story! This was my first chaptered fic, and your support really meant the world to me. Thank you to everyone for reading, and to those particular saints who left comments each chapter, I hope you know how much I appreciate you!
> 
> Eternal love and thanks to my best friend, who watched Skam just to help with this and was the best cheerleader anyone could ask for.
> 
> Lastly, if you enjoyed my art, check out [my art tumblr](https://ravenclawkward-art.tumblr.com/tagged/evak)! I take requests!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Kudos and comments are much appreciated! 
> 
> Come hang out with me at [my art tumblr](https://ravenclawkward-art.tumblr.com/) — I paint these boys more than is advisable.


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